Lauren or how to love life as an expat mom of three and a trailing spouse

Tell us a little about you. 

I'm Lauren!  Originally from New Jersey in the United States, but currently living as an expat with my husband and three children in Barcelona. Prior to moving abroad, I worked in Event Marketing, Journalism and Media Relations and was a freelance writer. It wasn't until moving abroad that I became inspired to start a blog.  I've always loved writing but had never before been as inspired as I am right now to write about our family's journey in this remarkable city!  When I'm not writing, I'm partnering with local and regional brands as an Instagram Influencer, working on my children's book for expat kids, and of course exploring as much of Spain as possible with my wonderful family.  

How did you end up living in Spain?  

My husband worked at the time as the head of Human Resources for a company that was expanding their European presence into Barcelona.  He had always dreamed of living abroad, although I was a bit reserved about the whole thing.  When we were newlyweds, sure!  But after having kids, the thought of moving across the world really worried me. However, once my husband was tapped on the shoulder to take an opportunity in beautiful Barcelona, we both simultaneously fell in love with the idea.  Even after three years here, I still walk around this city and pinch myself to see if I'm not just dreaming.

You followed your husband to Barcelona, how is being a "trailing spouse"? 

I really love this question!  Being a trailing spouse can be quite tricky and the secret is finding balance.  In one breath you are excited at the prospect of starting a new life in a foreign city.  At the same time, you have an enormous amount of responsibility to establish your home life without your spouse by essentially leaving everything familiar behind and starting from ground zero.  It can be very overwhelming!  I was a stay-at-home mom at the time before relocating and although I worked as a freelance writer, there wasn't a steady thriving career I was leaving behind.  So when we relocated to Barcelona, I knew the pressure was really on to reinvent myself and make the most of this new life.  Looking back after three years, I'm super proud of myself (if I may!): I've made such wonderful friends, have started a successful blogging career about living abroad, and all the while learning the local language.  Being a trailing expat spouse isn't easy, but it can be so rewarding if you're willing to put yourself out there and be open to anything.  

Was the COVID-19 crisis difficult as a "trailing spouse"?  

Oh my goodness, yes!  While COVID has certainly been more difficult for others and I feel blessed to have a healthy family here at home, I can sincerely say the lockdown in Spain was one of the most challenging times of my life.  We live in a lovely apartment on the fifth floor in city center Barcelona.  But I never anticipated when we chose this apartment that our family of five would spend so many endless hours inside these walls.  There were six straight weeks when my children were not permitted to step outdoors.  With my husband working full time from home (a makeshift "office" we set up in our bedroom), the responsibilities of children and school naturally fell on me.  It was painful and the days were very long, to say the least.  But we made it.  We leaned on one another when we needed to.  And like many parts of being an expat couple, you always come out stronger on the other side.

What did you learn from this rather unusual year as an expat, and a mom?  

I've always been the type of person that "takes it all on" and never likes asking for help.  I try to be quite independent and do not necessarily like relying on others.  Real "supermom" type mentality.  If COVID has taught me anything, it's that asking for help and admitting when you're overwhelmed is never a bad thing.  As a mom, we've all had it rough this past year.  As expats, the same.  This was the first time in my life when I really had to let my guard down and admit that I needed others to help me get through those trying weeks.  

Do you have any upcoming plans or projects regarding your expat life?  

Something I'm currently working on and am super excited about is a children's book for expat kids (ages 4-7).  The story is inspired by my own middle daughter, Autumn, who has really embraced her life abroad alongside her beloved stuffed bunny, Bun-Bun.  The book is appropriately called "A Passport for Bun-Bun" and is meant to help comfort future and existing expat children as they experience one of the biggest changes in their lives.  Hoping to have the book published and for sale in the first quarter 2021!