Single mother of 5, wanting to move to Vietnam

Hello!!


I have been researching on moving to Vietnam for some time now but I haven't found any topics that is specific to me so I hope this would bring me some clarity on the topic at hand. As stated above I am a single mother who wishes to permanently move to VN from US. I plan to retire my mother and move us all so what would be the best course of action I can take on now to be better prepared in making this move possible?

I have read on different forums that for the most part, Vietnam is pretty friendly with foreigners but my mother says otherwise. Is establishing a home and job difficult if you are not there officially. What is childcare and schooling like?

I have a bunch more questions but I don't know if I will get a response so hopefully I hear something back!!


THANKS!!

Hello,  my first question is have you visited Vietnam before? 

@llbeguelin yes I have, its been a couple yrs now that I have had my children but I have been 5 times. Staying almost a mth each time.

@sandynguyen134


You don't say what is your nationality, that of your children, and your mother. This matters.


For instance, my [Vietnamese girl]friend informs me that she can go to Cambodia, Thailand, Singapore, and Indonesia without a visa -- just a stamp on her passport when she enters these countries (and others, too).


Currently, Americans can ONLY get a 30-day visa to enter Vietnam as tourists. So, that's different, huh?


For people living in Vietnam (or other countries) who have American, Canadian, New Zealand, or Australian passports, the laws present some challenges. Those can all be summarized by category:


• Visas and residence permits, travel into and out of the country;

• Health care, health insurance, and accessibility (can you find a doctor who can communicate with you?);

• Banking and money transfers, credit card management (some US cards won't allow a Vietnam address as the home address);

• Navigating various bureaucracies around renting a flat or house, buying property; buying a vehicle, getting a driver's license, registering with the police, finding paid work, and paying taxes among others, depending on what you're trying to do;


I have friends and family all with North American passports (US, Canada) living in Vietnam, Thailand, India, Mexico, Ecuador, and Germany -- it's different everywhere, but the challenges are as above.


Ecuador is so friendly to Americans retiring there that after 6 months and some $$ deposited in a national bank, they can join the Ecuadorean equivalent of Medicare -- health insurance for retirees -- at a rate of some $45/month!


Vietnam has nothing like that.

I am checking Vietnam Education, and I was surprise for there school fee under private and international schools its pricey. From 10k to more than that

With a name like Sandy Nguyen, were you born in Vietnam or was at least one of your parents born in Vietnam?  If so you can get Vietnamese citizenship which would at least solve the issue of school and health care.  Was your mom born in Vietnam?  Without that you would be looking at a minimum of $30,000-$100,000 per year for education for five kids.  Plus health care costs.


If you can establish citizenship that would solve the issue of staying permanently.  Without that there is no mechanism to make it a permanent residence without frequent trips outside of the country to activate visas.  Currently there is only a 30 day visa available.  It should be moving to 90 days soon but that is still four trips outside of the country and everyone - you, mom and all five kids - would have to travel outside the country.  Again, if you can obtain citizenship this is a non-issue.

Hope you have lots of money & a good education vietnam is no longer a cheap option to live

first: I will not ask about your children's father permission to leave the country (or to change their nationality) because you already have it resolved.... right?


second: As @SteinNebraska has asked to you, because your familyname is Nguyen, the answer could resolve a lot of problems to you. If your father is vietnamese, simple take his documents and go to the VN-Embassy in USA and ask for your dual-nationality or for a permanent residence. Keep in mind that if you want to ask for a vn-citizenship, your name must be changed to a vn-name. After that you can think about your mother and children.


third: about your mother's opinion, she is right... Vietnamese people are very nice with tourists, but for a long-term-expats this is different and is also a big psico-shock if you in benefit of your transition don't get a place where other foreigners use to live (and that places are very expensive) ... on the contrary you will feel yourself alone, because nobody cares about you, nobody will respond when you say hello... worst if you don't speak vietnamese.

Hello and welcome to the forum. I am an American Expat, married to a Vietnamese woman. I have been living here in HCMC since January 2016. I disagree with those who say that long term Expats are not welcome here and the people are not friendly. I walk my dog around the neighborhood every night and more often than not someone will stop to say hi and pet the dog, telling me how cute he is. I often say hi to people (both with and without my dog) and they often return the greeting. I've had several people go out of their way to help me over the years and have never had any trouble with anyone. As others have pointed out, your family name indicates that there is Vietnamese blood in your family line. With citizenship you won't need a visa and children under 6 years old can get free childcare. All children (with Vietnamese citizenship) can attend primary and secondary school with only small expenses such as meals, uniforms, books and school supplies. Compared to America, I find the cost of living here in Vietnam to be very low. You can watch some videos on Youtube for more information. One guy my wife likes calls himself "ninja teacher" and covers many different topics concerning life in Vietnam from a foreigners point of view. Feel free to contact us if you have anymore questions. You can send me a private message request if you like. Good luck to you and your family.         

Dual citizenship may not be as easy to obtain as it may sound on here. I was born in VN and left when I was about 7. My parents became US citizens and lost their VNese citizenship and so did the rest of the family. My parents have passed and they never got their VNese citizenship back and my dad lived in Saigon for almost 2 decades before he passed. My older sister hired a service to locate her birth certificate and they were able to locate her birth certificate. I tried the same service but for some reason they could not locate my birth certificate. They tried a few times with no luck. They were going to refund me the costs but I told them to keep the money because they already spent the time trying to locate my birth certificate and it was only $200 so they were not going to get paid if they just sat around and did nothing. This means I will just use my visa exemption to live in VN when I move there.


@sandynguyen134

If you cannot get a dual citizenship, I'm pretty sure you can get a 5 year visa exemption because you or your parents were born in VN. With the 5 year VEC, you will only need to leave the country every 6 months. When I applied for my VEC, I didn't have to prove I was born in VN maybe because of my age or because I never changed my VNese name. Just had to show my US passport.

Good luck!

@drutter hello, please won't consider my answer to you as a discusion or debate... just I'm curious. In my previous message I said to prefer zones where most of expats use to be agrouped: such as Districts 1,2,4 and Binh Thanh. Maybe you, @drutter, are living and/or working in those zones, and I agree people there is more educated and friendly, and those zones are quite expensive.  Other sectors such as Go Vap, D12, Tan Phu, etc, the rental is less than 6 millions VND (USD$300) and of course you can find at least few people like what we consider as friendly and warm. As a daily shock in tis country: just try to walk the streets and tell me if a motobiker driving in front to you in the same sidewalk lets you pass.... well maybe I'm not writing well in English, but I'm sure you got my example and you know how often it happens.  Oh sorry maybe I was dreaming with sidewalks in Saigon?? 1f602.svg


@sandynguyen134
If you cannot get a dual citizenship, I'm pretty sure you can get a 5 year visa exemption because you or your parents were born in VN. With the 5 year VEC, you will only need to leave the country every 6 months. When I applied for my VEC, I didn't have to prove I was born in VN maybe because of my age or because I never changed my VNese name. Just had to show my US passport.
Good luck!
-@qnbui



mmmmm... maybe 5 years VEC is not good for her, because you can stay maximum 6 months per year,  and the original question was How to live in Vietnam

mmmmm... maybe 5 years VEC is not good for her, because you can stay maximum 6 months per year, and the original question was How to live in Vietnam
-@ajairon


It's not 6 months per year. You just need to do a visa run every 6 months.

Hello!!

Hi there sandynguyen134

I have been researching on moving to Vietnam for some time now but I haven't found any topics that is specific to me so I hope this would bring me some clarity on the topic at hand. As stated above I am a single mother who wishes to permanently move to VN from US. I plan to retire my mother and move us all so what would be the best course of action I can take on now to be better prepared in making this move possible?
I have read on different forums that for the most part, Vietnam is pretty friendly with foreigners but my mother says otherwise.

Like any society, you will have people who will accept you as a foreigner while others will not. I can say though that I have seen Viet Kieu being treated with disdain by the locals, for no other reason than the fact that they are Viet Kieu.

Is establishing a home and job difficult if you are not there officially.

Yes, and highly illegal (I'm assuming that by "officially", you mean legally). When (not "if") you are discovered, you could expect deportation, a very hefty fine for each of the individuals, being blacklisted from reentering Vietnam, and possibly even incarceration. Please, if for no ones sake but that of your children, do not even consider it.

What is childcare and schooling like?

Public schools are substandard by western standards (that's assuming enrollment would even be permitted). Private schools, from what I have read from other expats, is better but at a cost of ~$10,000 USD per student/year. Int'l schools, top tier, have been reported by members to charge up to a staggering $35,000 per student/year.

I have a bunch more questions but I don't know if I will get a response so hopefully I hear something back!!
THANKS!!
-@sandynguyen134

Information I have received, as well as reports from resident Viet Kieu expats, says that VN does not recognize dual citizenship. If you are Viet Kieu, the 5 year VEC would be your easiest legal route.


The Conditions For The Foreigners To Apply Vietnamese Citizenship (external Link)


  - Have full civilization action about full capacity as the regulations of Vietnam law.

  - Obey the Vietnamese constitution and laws; respect the traditions, customs and habits of Vietnames ethnic.

  - Know Vietnamese enough to integrate into Vietnamese community.

  - Having resided in VN from 5 years up to the time of application for Vietnam naturalization .

  - Having the ability to ensure life in Vietnam.

  - Must renounce foreign nationality.

  - Must Have Vietnamese names, and clearly stated in the decision of citizenship application.


Also, see "Some special cases" (external Link, lower down on page)


From what I've been able to ascertain, a person can hold dual American (or Canadian, British, Australian etc) and Vietnamese citizenship, provided that person held Vietnamese citizenship at the time of being granted their citizenship from the second country.

However, if you are an American citizen (or Canadian, British, Australian etc) and you wish to apply for Vietnamese citizenship, your current citizenship must be renounced.


I'm happy to be corrected on this if I am wrong.

I've not done much research on this subject.

Hello!!
I have been researching on moving to Vietnam for some time now but I haven't found any topics that is specific to me


I make this mistake a lot, but I'm going to assume that you really and truly want to know the cold, hard facts.


Your topic really isn't unique, except for the number of children, but that in and of itself is not going to change anything, except for the huge challenges the children will face and questions about the current role of the childrens' father.


...I am a single mother who wishes to permanently move to VN from US.


(Please remember: YOU ARE ANONYMOUS in this forum, so it's safe to answer pointed questions with specific--even detailed--replies).


What does "single mother" mean in your specific case?


Are you widowed, divorced or did an anonymous donor father the children?


If the father is alive, does he have any parental rights already established?


If the father does have parental rights, what does he think about your plan, or have you discussed it with him, or do you ever plan to discuss it with him?


If the children are not dual nationality (two passports) and the father has parental rights and knows about and doesn't agree with your plan to take the children out of the country, he can file for a court order to keep you from doing so:


state.gov/content/travel/en/International-Parental-Child-Abduction/prevention


However, in the absence of a specific court order, the US Government will normally not restrict you from taking your minor children out of the country:


(from the above link):

"...the United States does not have exit controls or require two-parent consent for a minor to travel across international borders. Law enforcement may be unable to prevent an abduction without a valid court order clearly prohibiting the child's travel outside of the United States"


As an aside, if you are currently collecting child support from a father who is residing in the United States, it will be possible to continue collecting it while living overseas.


HOWEVER, if your cost of living significantly drops when you move overseas, the father can file for a reduction in support based on your new circumstances, which you would have to declare to the court under penalty of perjury.


I plan to retire my mother and move us all so what would be the best course of action I can take on now to be better prepared in making this move possible?


As the English idiom rightly states, "The Devil is in The Details", and as others have already indicated, we need more SPECIFIC information from you in order to provide the best feedback possible.


We need to know:


Your current financial/employment/citizenship status:


Are you gainfully employed NOW and able to support your family in the United States?


What special skills and/or education degrees do you possess?


Have you managed to accumulate significant savings & assets that you'll be able to liquidate for use OR INVESTMENT in Việt Nam?


As your user name suggests, are you in fact Việt Kiều (a non-citizen person of Vietnamese nationality or descent living outside Việt Nam)?


Do you have any Vietnamese citizen residents of Việt Nam who can legally sponsor an extended stay (Temporary Resident Card - TRC - THẺ TẠM TRÚ) for you?


Is your mother a Vietnamese citizen, or (if she is Việt Kiều) is she qualified to become a Vietnamese citizen or regain previous citizenship lost?


Assuming you are a US citizen by birth, is your mother a US citizen by birth or a naturalized citizen or living in the United States on permanent resident status (green card)?


Specific details will make it easier to give you accurate advice.


I have read on different forums that for the most part, Vietnam is pretty friendly with foreigners but my mother says otherwise.


Maybe discuss this matter further with your mother, as it sounds as if she may understand this issue based on her knowledge of this culture.


We usually side-step the question of bigotry in the forum, because it so often devolves into pointless arguments & ad hominem attacks that are not tolerated by the admin moderators.


But the reality is that we (foreigners) know there is some bigotry in Vietnam; more so for some nationalities than others.


The best overt treatment is reserved for GREEN foreigners, meaning, those who are independently wealthy

🤑🤑🤑


However, certain nationalities (especially Cambodians, Africans, Chinese and those of subcontinent Indian descent) will quickly tell you they regularly experience discrimination based on their race/nationality.


In general, caucasian foreigners (Especially English-speaking people) receive a surprisingly warm welcome in the major cities.


However, there are still some paradoxical views of mixed-race children of a Vietnamese parent.


On the one hand, when a Vietnamese person creates a child with a US citizen parent, this is very often seen as the "salvation" of the family (especially an impoverished family) as it's expected the child (a US citizen by birth) will grow to become successful & prosperous in the United States and support their family in Việt Nam.


On the other hand, many traditionalists here still view children of mixed nationalities as less than "pure" & inferior to "pure-bred" Vietnamese children.


Is establishing a home and job difficult if you are not there officially.


The key word unspoken here is VISA.


When you say "not there officially", we assume you mean on a TOURIST visa.


You cannot legally work here without a work permit and you cannot gain a legal work permit without a legal employment visa and you cannot gain a legal employment visa without an official invitation to enter Vietnam for the purpose of approved employment and you cannot get that invitation letter unless you are able to provide full documentation for your qualification to be employed in a position that Vietnamese people cannot otherwise fill.


You must be either an expert with certifiable experience or a college graduate who is able to become certified as a teacher of English as a second language (ESL)


Your other options are to invest in a business (₫600,000,000 VNĐ/approximately $25,322 USD minimum capital contribution for a 1-year business visa OR ₫3,000,000,000 VNĐ capital contribution for a 3-year TRC) or marry a Vietnamese citizen man, allowing you and your children to all live here with 3-year TRCs, except in particular provinces that restrict spousal TRCs to 2 years, such as Bà Rịa - Vũng Tàu.


You cannot legally work here during an approved 6-month VISIT on a 5-year Visa Exemption Certificate (VEC).


What is childcare and schooling like?


In this culture, your mother would be your childcare, unless your individual employer provides it.


Schools here function under the control of the government, and for purposes of national unity and the promotion of communist party ideology & values, they do an excellent job.


However, schools here are quite different from those in the United States (in terms of facilities and a lack of truly uncensored liberal arts education) unless you have the money previously mentioned to enroll your children in an international school.


Even so, there are NO schools here (including international schools) that are not subject to the oversight of the national government.


As previously mentioned in other threads, only Vietnamese citizen children who are fluent in Tiếng Việt are allowed to enroll in Vietnamese public schools, and it's still not totally free for them (as previously mentioned).


I have a bunch more questions but I don't know if I will get a response so hopefully I hear something back!!


Hopefully this response will be helpful to you, even though it might appear to lack empathy.


It's my style to be dry and matter-of-fact when replying to inquiries such as yours, but I'm always keeping in mind the casual reader who may be drawn to read this thread.


I truly do hope you will have great and fulfilling success with your plans.


Cheers!


O.B.

third: about your mother's opinion, she is right... Vietnamese people are very nice with tourists, but for a long-term-expats this is different and is also a big psico-shock if you in benefit of your transition don't get a place where other foreigners use to live (and that places are very expensive) ... on the contrary you will feel yourself alone, because nobody cares about you, nobody will respond when you say hello... worst if you don't speak vietnamese.
-@ajairon


***.................nobody will say hello. Well that might be the case as far as you are concerned so you obviously have some kind of a problem.

I am an old Scotsman lived here for more than 15 happy years, firstly out in the sticks of Tay Ninh for more than 8 years, district 12 for 5 years & now Tan Phu & always in areas with little or no expats & the friendliness, hospitality & helpfulness of 99% the people I have met is humbling to be honest. As for saying hello, nearly everyone I meet, kids, adults (especially the ladies old or not so old) all smile & say hello in English mostly!

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third: about your mother's opinion, she is right... Vietnamese people are very nice with tourists, but for a long-term-expats this is different and is also a big psico-shock if you in benefit of your transition don't get a place where other foreigners use to live (and that places are very expensive) ... on the contrary you will feel yourself alone, because nobody cares about you, nobody will respond when you say hello... worst if you don't speak vietnamese.
-@ajairon
***.................nobody will say hello. Well that might be the case as far as you are concerned so you obviously have some kind of a problem.
I am an old Scotsman lived here for more than 15 happy years, firstly out in the sticks of Tay Ninh for more than 8 years, district 12 for 5 years & now Tan Phu & always in areas with little or no expats & the friendliness, hospitality & helpfulness of 99% the people I have met is humbling to be honest. As for saying hello, nearly everyone I meet, kids, adults (especially the ladies old or not so old) all smile & say hello in English mostly!
-@goodolboy


You forgot to mention you are incredibly generous and handsome... 😉


Seriously, IMNSHO, I think the average experience can be markedly different for us lilly white caucasians than it sometimes is for other ethnic groups, such as people who hail from the subcontinent.


I've heard of similar experiences far too often to believe that it's just individuals and their personal problems.

third: about your mother's opinion, she is right... Vietnamese people are very nice with tourists, but for a long-term-expats this is different and is also a big psico-shock if you in benefit of your transition don't get a place where other foreigners use to live (and that places are very expensive) ... on the contrary you will feel yourself alone, because nobody cares about you, nobody will respond when you say hello... worst if you don't speak vietnamese.
-@ajairon


***.................nobody will say hello. Well that might be the case as far as you are concerned so you obviously have some kind of a problem.
I am an old Scotsman lived here for more than 15 happy years, firstly out in the sticks of Tay Ninh for more than 8 years, district 12 for 5 years & now Tan Phu & always in areas with little or no expats & the friendliness, hospitality & helpfulness of 99% the people I have met is humbling to be honest. As for saying hello, nearly everyone I meet, kids, adults (especially the ladies old or not so old) all smile & say hello in English mostly!
-@goodolboy

You forgot to mention you are incredibly generous and handsome... 😉....................................ah yes I forgot to take that into account1f60e.svg

Seriously, IMNSHO, I think the average experience can be markedly different for us lilly white caucasians than it sometimes is for other ethnic groups, such as people who hail from the subcontinent..................................& thats why I posted & commented. The person generalised from his experience & made out that it was normal for Vietnamese to be un friendly & not say hello.

I've heard of similar experiences far too often to believe that it's just individuals and their personal problems................-@OceanBeach92107


I personally don't blame the Vietnamese for trying to keep their bloodlines pure like you say, just look at what's happening in the UK, US, Europe, Canada etc at least the Vietnamese retain the option of asking us foreigners politely to leave.


So as a follow up to my previous post I decided to do a survey this morning as an outgoing, friendly, handsome like you say lily White (but with a nice sun tan) 72 year old on my walk through the gardens & round the park & the results were as follows:-


eye contact with a smile & polite nod of the head = 10

eye contact with a smile & "Xin chào" = 2

eye contact with a smile & "hello how are you today" = 8

eye contact with a smile & "good morning" = 10

eye contact with a smile & "morning" = 8

eye contact with a smile & hello stop for a chat = 2


Put yourself out, be prepared to have a bit of a laugh at your own expense & most Vietnamese will respond positively especially the ladies.

Put yourself out, be prepared to have a bit of a laugh at your own expense & most Vietnamese will respond positively especially the ladies.
-@goodolboy

I could not agree more, goodolboy.


"Amazing how much a "nod-and-a-wink" on first meeting can net you on subsequent encounters."

third: about your mother's opinion, she is right... Vietnamese people are very nice with tourists, but for a long-term-expats this is different and is also a big psico-shock if you in benefit of your transition don't get a place where other foreigners use to live (and that places are very expensive) ... on the contrary you will feel yourself alone, because nobody cares about you, nobody will respond when you say hello... worst if you don't speak vietnamese.
-@ajairon

I've been here 6 years now, and have never lived in an "expat community". I wrote in another thread, Your first days in your home in Vietnam; "My knowledge of VN has increased greatly, but certainly not to the point where I would claim any sort of proficiency. And this is after 6 years, having the vast, vast majority of my friends, acquaintances, and contacts being VN. " (Link to older thread)


***.................nobody will say hello. Well that might be the case as far as you are concerned so you obviously have some kind of a problem.
I am an old Scotsman lived here for more than 15 happy years, firstly out in the sticks of Tay Ninh for more than 8 years, district 12 for 5 years & now Tan Phu & always in areas with little or no expats & the friendliness, hospitality & helpfulness of 99% the people I have met is humbling to be honest. As for saying hello, nearly everyone I meet, kids, adults (especially the ladies old or not so old) all smile & say hello in English mostly!
-@goodolboy

Saigon 2.5 years, T.P. Thai Nguyen 2 years, and now Phu Quoc 1.5 years, and my experience mirrors yours (even after they learn that I'm not leaving any time soon LOL!)


You forgot to mention you are incredibly generous and handsome... 😉   Seriously, IMNSHO, I think the average experience can be markedly different for us lilly white caucasians than it sometimes is for other ethnic groups, such as people who hail from the subcontinent.  I've heard of similar experiences far too often to believe that it's just individuals and their personal problems. -@OceanBeach92107

Lilly white?! I wish! More like fish-belly white, here. But yes, I have to agree with you that a certain segment of VN society can be very judgemental, as I wrote earlier in this thread (Link to #14), but certainly not all segments. In my experience prejudice diminishes with increased education, experience, and exposure to different people/cultures.


...& thats why I posted & commented. The person generalised from his experience & made out that it was normal for Vietnamese to be un friendly & not say hello. I personally don't blame the Vietnamese for trying to keep their bloodlines pure like you say, just look at what's happening in the UK, US, Europe, Canada etc at least the Vietnamese retain the option of asking us foreigners politely to leave. So as a follow up to my previous post I decided to do a survey this morning as an outgoing, friendly, handsome like you say lily White (but with a nice sun tan) 72 year old on my walk through the gardens & round the park & the results were as follows:-
eye contact with a smile & polite nod of the head = 10
eye contact with a smile & "Xin chào" = 2
eye contact with a smile & "hello how are you today" = 8
eye contact with a smile & "good morning" = 10
eye contact with a smile & "morning" = 8
eye contact with a smile & hello stop for a chat = 2
Put yourself out, be prepared to have a bit of a laugh at your own expense & most Vietnamese will respond positively especially the ladies.
-@goodolboy

Well, ajairon's comment is a reflection of his experience here in VN. I've not been to Ecuador (yet!), but I have been to several other Hispanic countries. Ajairon's level of culture shock (i.e. separation from family, loss of lifelong peer group, etc) may be magnitudes greater than that of expats coming from other countries/cultures (eg. Northern Europeans).


As far as "...trying to keep their bloodlines pure...", I've got to disagree with you on that one. Remember, there are 54 different ethnic groups making up the people of Vietnam. With the exception of a very small minority these different ethnic groups coexist, and intermix/intermarry with regularity. Even the small minorities I mentioned, holding (justifiable?) grievances mostly related to land use/ownership, hold no animosity towards other ethnic groups.


I have three VN friends, two male and one female who are called, and refer to themselves as, "người con lai" (Google dich; half blood), or "con lai" (Google dich; crossbred). The lady is stunning, prides herself on her mixed status, and is admired by the local VN young men. The two guys are proud as peacocks with the beard they can grow (wispy as it is, lol), and I'm told inspire envy in their VN peers.


Miscegenation in VN culture has been ongoing for centuries (with Chinese, Khmer, Lao, and Thai, especially, but later to a not small degree both French and American due to geopolitical events as it were). What VN holds on to, fiercely, is not so much blood-line as it is the culture, language and patriotism.

@qnbui well, maybe yes but it will depend on what she could need for living here, workin, paying taxes, open a bank account, make a loan, buy a car, children to continue studying, etc.   The Labor Dpmt (working permit), banks, Police home-registration, etc   strictly cares about the maximum time a visa permits.   And also, 5 people going every 6 months to cross the border has a price (cambodian visa, pictures, taxi to the border)

Well, ajairon's comment is a reflection of his experience here in VN. I've not been to Ecuador (yet!), but I have been to several other Hispanic countries. Ajairon's level of culture shock (i.e. separation from family, loss of lifelong peer group, etc) may be magnitudes greater than that of expats coming from other countries/cultures (eg. Northern Europeans).
-@Aidan in HCMC


Hey man, really thanks for your considerations, but I'm not an abandoned puppy in the street 1f602.svg1f923.svg.... My opinion was based on my daily experiences, waiting for an elevator and almost none respect the qeue or entering into the elevator saying "Xin chao" and everybody keeps on silence... in South Korea is similar.


Good for all others that are lucky to receive a "Xin loi anh, I'm riding my motorbike on your sidewalk, please you first"


It's really fascinating how it turns 180 degrees when you enter to a Điện máy XANH or Thế Giới Di Động, respect!


Well, I just said to the OP that anyone can feel lonely while passing this transition (specially since she requieres coming here, but are her kids and mom so excited?) of learning from the Vietnameses and adapt themselves to these ways because this is their country and this engine works perfectly to them.


Finally talking about kindness/friendliness.- Every opinion, correction or disagreement is always welcome to me, but attacking with expresions such as "what a load of absolute *** you are talking" that person has lost the topic.

My opinion was based on my daily experiences...
-@ajairon

I think I said that.

Well, ajairon's comment is a reflection of his experience here in VN. ... Ajairon's level of culture shock may be magnitudes greater than that of expats coming from other countries/cultures (eg. Northern Europeans). -@Aidan in HCMC





-@ajairon

no you did not just say................Well, I just said to the OP that anyone can feel lonely while passing this transition (specially since she requieres coming here, but are her kids and mom so excited?) of learning from the Vietnameses and adapt themselves to these ways because this is their country and this engine works perfectly to them.

.what you said was ..................third: about your mother's opinion, she is right... Vietnamese people are very nice with tourists, but for a long-term-expats this is different and is also a big psico-shock if you in benefit of your transition don't get a place where other foreigners use to live (and that places are very expensive) ... on the contrary you will feel yourself alone, because nobody cares about you, nobody will respond when you say hello... worst if you don't speak vietnamese.

Which is your personal experience & is a reflection on you. For every ex pat like you there are 100 that have lived here long term like me, don't speak Vietnamese & have never had a problem fitting in to life in Vietnam & love it even for all its idiosyncrasies.