Remembrance Sunday ....

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

That is super low to steal from charity but then again I suspect those big charities also don't donate all they could to their causes.
It's better I think to give directly to a person in need without using a middle man who might be tempted to put their finger in the till..

They stole the pot. But I get the point.

Every pub in UK tends to have a charity pot, and it is usually chained to the bar in some way so people can't half-inch it. Sorry rhyming slang, pinch it. But they will get a pair of snips or something as there is usually quite a lot of money in it, British people being quite generous in that way.

The most generous, according to statistics, are Americans. They donate more money to charity than any other country, so the statistics say. You would not think that offhand, you would think they were all scheming capitalist b-s, but actually Americans donate more of a proportion of their income to charity than any other country on the planet.

You can only give when you can. I try my best. I am lucky, I have a warm house, a wife, a cat, food in the fridge, a telly, etc etc etc. I count myself very lucky. One day I will have some misfortune and be begging on the street, and maybe you will too. That is why I give to the homeless, not every one, but the ones in genuine need.

You don't have an address, you can't get a job. You don't have a job, you can't get an address. It is a viscious circle, and I try to break it.

My mate Charlie,Karoly, came to live with us for six months in England which he successfully completed an engineering course and got a job with the railways.

He swallowed his pride and asked to borrow some money so they could move up north. He asked in my opinion for too little money, it was is first month's rent and deposit, I said, you need more, so that you have spare in your back pocket in case you need it for unexpected things.

He paid it back every time on the dot, and also paid me a bonus, which I didn't want and was not expecting, and said Charlie you have overpaid me the last payment, he said Simon, I know, keep it, it is a thankyou.

That is how it works. Mate's rates. I didn't want it and I donated it to charity, but he kindly offered it and it was in my account so I couldn't do much with it but forward it on.

That is what nice people do. We are still good friends. We went to their wedding.

There is more to remembrance Sunday than remembering the dead. We have to remember the living as well.

Now my passion is for homeless people, but whatever yours is, just donate a bit into the pot for that cause. You can't do everything, I am not Bill and Melinda Gates that have managed nearly to eliminate malaria, well done to them, but I can't do that. What you CAN do, is just shake someones hand have a chat, homeless people usually are very lonely and love to have a chat, you can give them something, to buy a hamburger from McDonald's, it is not classy, but it is food. A couple of cigarettes or something, anything, homeless people are a waste of time, I mean, that they have too much time on their hands.

I am extroadinarily lucky. I have too much time on my hands too, but in a different way. I thank my lucky stars every day.

Here I sit out on the lawn in bed, Vega conspicuous overhead. Auden. That is how lucky I am, to have my own garden. It was Candide  or rather what was his protagonist, Voltaire, never remember the name, who says il faut cultiver notre jardin, we must dig our own garden. I never really think that a good translation.

I was in the shop and there were some sweeties and the box was in French so I switched into French kinda automatically, and then realised the girl behind the counter had no idea what I was saying as I was talking in French. Whoops. Okay, switch to Hungarian... .might be better...

The thing is I know what poverty is like, and it is not pretty. I have been unemployed for months and I don't get social security or unemployment benefit, I am all right at the moment, because of my wife working, and our agreement was she does the nine to five and I decorate the house, that was the agreement.

But we have lived in hard times when both of us have been out of work and we could not afford a light bulb or have the heating on, and had to snuggle up in our coats on a cold Remembrance Sunday.We have known hard times.

When we moved here in February everything was off, I had to get it all refitted, the electiricity switched back on, we sat in the kitchen with some takeaway playing cribbage with our coats on. It was -21C overnight in February and we had no heat. We would go to McDonalds, a little local scottish restaurant I know, to warm up.

This is why I give to the homeless. It is not pretty. To beg for money is not a pretty thing to do. I usually, the rough sleepers, I just put it in their hand, they are usually half awake as they never get a good night's sleep.

Be thankful for the things you have, and give to charity when you can. You can't always, you'd be in poverty yourself and that would serve nobody, but when you can, you must.

You can give in so many ways, it doesn't have to be money. I don't want to sound like I am patting myself on my back, but I gave a chap I had never met a tow home, as I have a fixed towbar and towball on my car at the time, and saved him some money so he could call out the RAC or AA or whoever from home rather than from Tesco, and he offered me a pint but I have to get home and as I already said I don't drink and drive, I learned my lesson.

I said, well, just pass it on to someone else, do someone else a favour. He said I always do. And I believe he was sincere. So I have done him a favour, he will do someone else a favour. Towing a two ton BMW with my Ford Sierra was a bit tricky, but we got there. My Ford Sierra seemed more reliable than his BMW but then that is because I have a Haynes manual

All you have to do, is "Pay it forward", give a bit in, that is part of being human, I think. You pay it forward. One day, you are going to need to ask for someone's help, and you paid it forward. It is not a question of capitalism, it is a question of socialism, or humanitarianism, call it what you want, you help someone when you can.

And amazingly you get it back. Not immediately, not always from the same person, but it comes back to you. It really does. Well that is my philosophy or religion whatever way you want to call it. It does come back.

Just be nice, and people will be nice to you. It's not actually tricky.

I am not sure what time I should celebrate Remembrance Sunday. The British are an hour behind us, so do I celebrate it at 11am British time, or 11am Hungarian time? It is not that important, as the main thing is to remember. It is not that important which time it is.

We went to the Hungarian remembrance service for the 1956 battle, so I have done the other side if you see what I mean. I laugh and joke and take the mickey, but people FOUGHT FOR OUR FREEDOM, which includes the freedom to be an idiot and laugh and joke. It is not something I take lightly.

I just don't quite know how to do it in Hungary. I have been to most of the cemetaries in Budapest and paid my respects, seen most of the war memorials. I just would KNOW how it goes in England, you have the Last Post, two minute's silence, then Reveille, then you have a march past. We are not going to have any of that so I don't know what to do. To stick a wreath on the local cenotaph maybe, I am not sure, but then do I put a Union Jack on it? Or a St George's Flag? I can easily do that, I just am not sure it would be appropriate.

If you were American, for example, would you put the Stars and Stripes on it? To say, hmm, this is us and indeed US honoring your dead? Or would that be misinterpreted? I don't know what to do.

I think I will just go to Church and pray quietly. I am not Catholic, and most churches around here are catholic, so I can do the Latin service but they do it in Hungarian nowadays. I just sit in the pew at the back and have a private word with God, if he exists, to say thank you for how blessed my life has been. It has been a struggle, Leviticus says man is born to struggle as the sparks fly upward, and indeed it is Bonfire Night in the UK two days ago, where we hanged a few catholics some four hundred years ago, Marilyn won't know this as it is pre-America.

I just don't know what would be the appropriate way to pay my respects. I want to pay my respects, but I don't know how to do it. I know what to do at a funeral, unfortunately I have been to many, I know the order of service and what to say and what to do. I just don't know what the appropriate response is.

Maybe I go to church and ask the vicar.

Marilyn Tassy wrote:

That is super low to steal from charity but then again I suspect those big charities also don't donate all they could to their causes.

In the UK, there is something called the Charities Commission which is super ineffective at monitoring charities, but charities self-report and say that they only take 3% in administration fees, or whatever. They do actually run on fumes, and with their ads, say 100% of your money will go to whatever cause they are promoting.

Now, that is unbelievable. You have a shop, Oxfam, you have loads of shops, and you have to pay rent on them. I might buy some second hand clothes from you, but you have to pay rent on that shop. You might get it cheaper than Tesco because it is a vacant lot and the owner would rather have it occupied than empty, waiting to be vandalised, you are still going to have to pay for it.

So I agree with you Marilyn the big charities are a bit disingenuous with this. They try to keep the costs down but have to pay SOMETHING to man or woman the phones, and to process the credit cards, and so on. It doesn't come for free, HSBC don't suddenly say oh, it is Oxfam, we will let them off the 0.75% charge on the card. HSBC is not a charity, it is a business. Or Lloyds or Natwest or Sberbank or whoever.

Charity is a very private thing, so please give to what you care about most. You cannot give to everything, otherwise you will be the one under the bridge and I will have to give to you.

Until a few years ago charities were not allowed to advertise on British television, now they are all over the place on daytime TV. All worthy causes I am sure. But I can't give to every single one of them, I would have to join Marilyn under the bridge.

And they have a trick of saying "just give three pounds a month", my wife did this a few years ago, and they increased it without her permission to ten pounds a month, I think it was the RSPCA. She just immediately cancelled it, she worked in a bank after all, and spotted it. Yes, three pounds a month I can afford, that is OK, but ten pounds, what is it going to be next month, twenty or forty that you have STOLEN from my account because I did not give you permission to take that amount of money.

So all these ads you get for "Just give three pounds a month", well f- that. If you are then going to get my bank account details and decide whenever you want to take whatever money you want, I am not giving to you, sorry.

Give to a small charity, where it counts. The big charities are basically businesses, and ruthless ones.

Give to the Legion. It doesn't just go for Remembrance Sunday, it supports our what americans call "veterans" all year round, at Chelsea or all across the UK. The Legion does more good work than you know, but they do it quietly and without a fuss. They support people with Alzheimer's, they support people without legs or arms who have been blown up  by a lndmine in some stupid war, they support everyone.

I am a big fan of the Legion and that is my cause, you can have your own. But please give something to the Legion. We don't have many WW2 veterans left, but they support old people in nursing homes, army barracks, hospitals, and all over the place, and do it quietly without fuss, day in, day out.

Why do you think I wear a poppy on my lapel? It is not some kind of statement, except the best kind of statement, that I support the Legion. I gave a hundred quid this year, there, now I have said it. It may not be a lot of money to you but is a lot of money to me. That would be a new cooker to me.

But I have a cooker. I have a microwave oven, I have a slow cooker, I have everything I need. Too much really. I don't need more stuff. We are not rich, but we get by, and fiddle the figures every payday to work out what we have for the month, and live on our budget, live within our means. And there was a bit spare. It could have gone in the savings account, but it went to the Legion.

someone else needs it more than I do. The Royal British Legion. They can have it. I can wait for a new cooker.

When I lived in a small village in England, I did the poppy collection appeal, was asked to do it by a Legionaire.

I tell you it is an absolute delight. Everyone wants a poppy and puts money in your pot. It was quite a posh village I suppose, and everyone knew me, it is a small village so everyone knows everyone, so it is not that they think I am Bob the Burglar but I think I raised about 87 pounds from that small village. And of course not everyone was in their house but I am sure they donated somewhere else.

So don't give me bullshit, if you want to go around on a cold November night asking people if they want a poppy, go and do it. I have. And the RBL got 87 pounds out of my pot, kindly donated by the residents of my village, I didn't count it as the pots are sealed but watched it going in.

If you want to go around on a cold November evening knocking on doors asking for money then help yourself, but I tell you something straight, you never get a bad response with a poppy. It was, I am not sure pleasurable is the right word, but admirable maybe will do. I never ever got a door shut in my face, it was OOH POPPIES and something in the pot.

Now you do it and see what you get. Because I have done it. I have collected for the RBL. Now, you do it, then you can bitch about it.

I also worked in pubs for many years as a sideline and donated all my wages from Christmas Eve to New Year's Day to the RBL. That was another 87 pounds, coincidentally, that could have been in my pocket but went to the RBL, every shift I worked and I got double time, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, New Year's Eve, New Year's Day, every shift I worked that paycheck went straight to the RBL. You don't have to believe me because there is a thankyou note in that pub from the RBL and the landlord asked whether he could put it on the wall, because all year round people had been putting in the jar, so it was not just mine.

As I say charity is a very private thing but in a pub, you like to stick up a thankyou note somewhere. Every penny I earned from working there, from Christmas Eve to New Year's Day, went in that pot.

I am not a hero, but not a bad man either. Give to whatever you want. That just happens to be mine.

Just to clear up any confusion, it's always local time - 10.45am for 11am.

Well another Remembrance Day ceremony has taken place and we were there.  The weather wasn't great - bit cold and foggy 4 or 5 C.  But It was a well attended turnout for a change.  Perhaps 80 people including some veterans with medals.   There was a piper too and the usual Hungarian military contingent with a bugler.

It was remarkably well supported by the international community, including the US Ambassador.  I don't recall that ever happening over the multiple times I've attended. 

Also represented there Australia, Czech Republic, Slovakia, Poland, Australia and NZ,  Malaysia etc and quite surprisingly for the first time I remember Ireland also included an all green wreath.   As usual the Hungarian Ministry of Defence and British International School laid wreaths.

There were about 5 religious readers/priests there for the different faiths.   

As usual, the British Ambassador offered refreshments and in a new twist, some curry at the Residence.   We've never attended that bit.  Maybe next time!

Overall, there seems to be renewed interest,  perhaps because it's 100 years since the end of WW1.  Hope the interest continues.

Out of remembrance:

D-Day was going on this week, 76 years ago.

June 6th, 1944.

klsallee wrote:

Out of remembrance:

D-Day was going on this week, 76 years ago.

June 6th, 1944.

Yes, indeed.   My dear old Dad was involved.  He was 20 years old then.   

He wasn't in the first waves but followed about a week later.   By then a lot of area had been cleaned up and they arrived at the Mulberry harbours. 

When you ask him about it, he just says they were ordered there and they just got on with the job given to them.  His generation have a tendency to understate such historic events but amazingly it's still quite fresh if you prompt him and ask the right questions.   He's one of the few left.  I don't think he has much nostalgia for those times.  It was all uncertainty and survival and just grit your teeth and bear it. Not sure how we would all cope in such trying times.

A reminder for all Commonwealth citizens about Remembrance Sunday this year, 2020.

This year the day falls on Sunday 8th November.

As usual, it will be at Solymar Commonwealth War Cemetery, just next to the Auchan supermarket starting at 10.45 for 11.00h. 

Details of where it is located here: Solymar War Cemetery

Today is Remembrance Day  11/11,  a day noted in many countries.   

At 11am wherever anyone is, perhaps this is the time to have 2 minutes silence to remember the dead in conflict all over the world.

On Sunday, 14th November at 11am, it will be the Remembrance Sunday service at Solymar Commonwealth War Cemetery, near Budapest (see link here for location: Solymar Commonwealth War Cemetery)

Further detail on Remembrance Sunday in Hungary:

XPATLOOP 14 Nov 2021 @10.45h Solymar Commonwealth War Cemetery

Once again, we're approaching Remembrance Sunday where we remember all the dead lost in war.

It's for everyone but especially Commonwealth citizens.

In 2022, it falls on Sunday 13 November.

Undoubtedly, the usual gathering will occur at the Solymar Commonwealth War Cemetery, near the Auchan supermarket starting at 10.55 for 11.00h. 

The Cemetery is located here: Solymar Commonwealth War Cemetery (links to Google Maps)

Link to British Embassy "invitation" here - British Embassy Budapest Invitation to the Annual Remembrance Ceremony, Solymár, 13 November

Update: I was there with about 50 other people - at least half were "official" representatives. A new thing were country flags on the grave markers. Mainly NZ and Australia but also a British flag (presumably dual national).  I expect there will be flags all over next year for the interned UK, South Africa and Poland military personnel. I was surprised to see Slovakian military officers and I think possibly the US Ambassador although it might have been the Canadian Ambassador. Whoever it was, they had a massive SUV, maybe bulletproofed and plenty of bodyguards talking into their hands/radios.