Loneliness when you're abroad

What about loneliness when you're a dude?

thats even worse when u are a dude @ HaileyinHongKong u tend to wonder what u wanna do but u cant do nothing especially if u are in a country where little can be done than just watch and be carefyul abt everything.

I wished u were a dude to understand what am talking abt.lo hahahahaha

I find loneliness more of a factor when my attitude is bad. Which one comes first? That can be difficult to figure out.

China is an easy place to feel lonely. You are surrounded by people, yet often completely alienated. The best way of combatting loneliness (after you've improved your attitude towards where you are, that is), is to get involved with the local people and culture. Develop some hobbies - sometimes having a common interest (i.e., cycling or photography) can transcend language problems.

If you can't get past a negative attitude, I'd say get out. Don't stay where you don't believe you are welcome. When you're an expat, you are usually there by choice. And you can choose to leave This is my third time in China, and it is going much better this time - I changed my attitude.

I remember inviting an expat for a cup of coffee so we could share experience but i was turned down politely.
Most of the times locals talk in their native language to each other when i'm around creating a barrier between them and me.
Moral of the story:
NOT every expat will want to hang out with you and
most of the times don't bother approaching locals your are not welcome. Let expats and locals approach YOU.

I am usually a loner but I love being around people & looking for friends but usually visited town centre and library surfing internet but again loan i miss family & friends back home.

It's so lonely when you don't even know
yourself

Wow... how many lonely people here.. Sometime ago I was working in UK for 2 years. Never felt lonely, not a second.

sometimes bored , isnt enough to describ ur day !!

especially in SA , sometime  the weather sucks, and by default no places to go ( except food, and food & food..)
to kill bordness, i go to gym for swiming, sleep or read books ; try to go with friends ( but they have their families so they dont go often for BBQ or ... )
You also have pc games

its hard to make friends in SA , especially when the whole country conisder you as "EXPAT" , and not just simple expat, like if u are from europe or USA\CA >> you are a GOOD expat, but when u are ARAb\ASIAN expat , u are low life for them ( in their mind)

and what is worst , is that even your own KIND ( nationailty) , when they are here, they become UNFRIENDLY towards each others .


if it was easy to get friends in here , i think it would ease life little bit.However i am only here til next year ; fuck money ;  i need to enjoy my 20-ish years before i get 30

The problem with public pools around here, too many people use them as toilets!

HaileyinHongKong wrote:

The problem with public pools around here, too many people use them as toilets!

i heared in china they have this red alarm ( where water turn red when someone piss in it )

:S goodluck with that
one good thing in saudi , is u can rent for a day , a pool with nice area + volleyball field for less than 200$
share it with friends &enjoy

Hi Guys
Lonliness is a thing which catches up with you when you are away from your friends ,your family .Im in Riga away from home and my frirmds I just chatt with my friends or watch some commedy series online to keep it busy or study

Very true it sucks

Thanks for the advice.They dont understan d how it feels when you are suurounded by people who dont speak your language and they dobt even care as if you dont exist for them

somethings dont change with time

Hi guys
I love to be alone as much as possible. i hate noisy, parties, crowded, congested cultures.. 

Only a hard feeling is,  when I’m in home sick. (miss my family lot, at that time call them or chat with them…)

Thanks for reading

I Skype my friends & family. I read,  I like to keep my mind busy.Window Shopping,Retail Therapy, have a nice walk, visit free exhibitions, musuems, displays as I am not in Full Time employment.
Speak french to someone I meet.I write letters also.I am glad i am healthy.

every 1 feel lonely some time. best what i do i watch movies or search on internat

missdiaz2 wrote:

I Skype my friends & family. I read,  I like to keep my mind busy.Window Shopping,Retail Therapy, have a nice walk, visit free exhibitions, musuems, displays as I am not in Full Time employment.
Speak french to someone I meet.I write letters also.I am glad i am healthy.

Hi
Nice to meet you here, and wish you be happy at all time...
Cheers..!

Reading is good for me. You're never alone with a book.

I also recommend "work-out". The exercise keep me fresh and energized.

Hopefully, this will help.

of course sometime i felt lonely also, and nothing i can do than surfing on net or reading magazine and listening to musics, in the end i am dozzing off...

The best way to meet people is to go out and do the things you like to do.

HaileyinHongKong wrote:

The best way to meet people is to go out and do the things you like to do.

I've tried that but i realize i was doing it alone.

happy Christmas to all here
bad thing to be lonely

I feel very lonely now ... Christmas is coming and it becomes painful ....

ya its really some thing touching

We go abroad for our futures/business and we sacrifice our homes/families
me working in SKA some some time
Miss my family a lot

no need to be lonely guys....

the big fat man is coming to town!!! just trying to cheer you up.. its Christmas and there is always a reason to celebrate

lets go and party!

victoria85 wrote:

no need to be lonely guys....

the big fat man is coming to town!!! just trying to cheer you up.. its Christmas and there is always a reason to celebrate

lets go and party!

Just because of Christmas people get lonely, when you are abroad you miss your family more then ever.
It feels not the same when they are not around or if you are not able to do your traditional things.

ya it happens some times
Better to keep yourself busy at that time
Either remembering love ones or
go out for meeting some friends
or go for sports/swimming etc

I feel lonely when i stay home in the weekend day time.
In that time, i often go caffe to read a book.
in fact i like to be alone...

Merry Christmas! all you lonely people.

i am planning to set up a steel unit out of india. i assume then even i will face lonely times. the best way out at the moment seems to tire myself at work so that i don't get time . i hope i am able to do it!!!

amm95amit wrote:

i am planning to set up a steel unit out of india. i assume then even i will face lonely times. the best way out at the moment seems to tire myself at work so that i don't get time . i hope i am able to do it!!!

You have a big project in your hands. You will be too busy to feel lonely.
The internet has reduced or shortened the distance from here to anywhere. You also find pockets of Indian community anywhere in many countries.

Correct me if i'm wrong : But when you move abroad  your friends and family contact you less and less gradually to the point that you realize that few people care about you. Only your parents continue to contact you after years. Most Family members and friends back home stop contacting you.

I don't think that they totally stop (I had some friends who had moved to another country long before I did and we never lost contact) but I agree that it is a great chance to realize who really cares.

Hericles wrote:

Correct me if i'm wrong : But when you move abroad  your friends and family contact you less and less gradually to the point that you realize that few people care about you. Only your parents continue to contact you after years. Most Family members and friends back home stop contacting you.

1. YOU moved abroad. To your friends, YOU moved away.
2. Even if you didn't move, you can't be sure their care for you will be the same forever. We have new encounters daily.
3. Parents and siblings are connected by blood. Even then, if you don't make the effort, they will leave you be.
4. You will make new friends and have new interests which will take up your time. Are you doing enough to keep in touch with the people you LEFT behind?
5. If your family and friends are so paramount to you, perhaps you should RETURN to your roots. Why did you LEAVE them in the FIRST place?

Wow, wait, we didn't abandon anyone. Being in another place doesnt mean that you stop caring. And it can even help and strengthen relationships. The better you feel about yourself and about your life, the more (energy, love, whatever)you are able to give to your loved ones.

I'm just a phonecall away from my friends and family and if they need me i'll be on the first flight to Greece. And there is no law that forbids them to come visit me here. They are always welcome and it would make me more than happy.

Loneliness is a complicated thing...

Here in Brazil, people are very friendly in general, like, very very friendly...yet I still feel lonely because their communication is not as straight-forward and they are easily offended if someone speaks their mind, even if it is done with a lot of delicacy and respect.

That leaves me still feeling lonely as I feel like I gotta keep everything inside.

Having someone who really understands they way you think and what you mean when you talk, without having to explain the intention all the time, helps in not feeling lonely. I will try to make some Quebecers friends here.

Good luck to all, and happy new year 2013!!

Emilie

Happy new year to you too, Emilie

well museums always work for me

when ever you feel alone, just relax and try to find new friend you can trust. one or two might be good
ask them to introduce anything around the city.

good luck!