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Western woman in Saudi

Last activity 14 September 2015 by bigbenman

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Willywonkxx

Hi all!
I will be relocating to Saudi with my husband and two little boys. 18months and 3years old.

What's it like living out there for a woman? I stumbled across a thread on here which was posted back in 2009. Probably didnt help much and thought maybe we need a more up to date on this as this particular lady said she had to be fully covered, face to bottom right from the airport?

She also said about letting men go first in things like queuing in the shops?! Does this still exist?

Many thanks

W

yahya_z_a

Hi,
Its not true to cover yourself from head to bottom, but to dress Abaya at ur shoulders you can show ur face and your hair.
also true her we respect womens in ques if they ask to be the first no one will refuse.
its a good place to live her, just be normal,
have a nice day

Willywonkxx

Thanks for that reply.

TMChaudhry

Welcome to Saudi Arabia

Many western women are enjoying life in KSA. Wearing traditional Abaya for women is a legal requirement but covering face is not compulsury.Qs in shopping mall for man first is not existing but the women get more respect in all public places.There are many western compounds where u will like your own country---So nothing wrong here.goodluck n welcome

sophie1991

Thanks for opening this thread.  :)
I am to move to Saudi Arabia with my husband and infant and have read same posts and it really freaked me out. As far as I've learned wearing abaya and covering your hair is must.
What I am really concerned about is that I think It is so hard for a woman there to find a job.
Also, we are considered under the sponsorship of our husbands and you can't work unless you are out of your husband's sponsorship.... Sounds little  bit complicated for me. Maybe anybody out here has  a better understanding about the issue?
Is it possible for a woman to have a succesful career there?

booksale

If you find a job and your employer is willing to change the sponsorship for you, you can work here. I saw an ad. inside the compound looking for females teachers in a school. So I guess there are chances deoending on what jobs you are looking for.

sophie1991

booksale wrote:

If you find a job and your employer is willing to change the sponsorship for you, you can work here. I saw an ad. inside the compound looking for females teachers in a school. So I guess there are chances deoending on what jobs you are looking for.


Yes, teaching jobs are only options I've found So far.

booksale

Nurses?

Not sure about other occupations. Maybe some other women who's working here can tell.

booksale

Sophie, what's your field?

By the way, you don't need to cover your hair.

sophie1991

booksale wrote:

Sophie, what's your field?

By the way, you don't need to cover your hair.


I have a BA degree but long time practical experience in teaching English.

I think uncovered woman takes too much atantion from men there which another hand can be more bothering than wearing a vail actually.

booksale

They first few days I was without abaya and I had no hassles from anyone. I was with my husband and my baby as a family though. Not sure if this is the case for single women. And of course, if given choice, I would prefer no abaya.

Sophie, I think you can get a job in teaching English fairly quickly here.

It is easier to come as a family than as a single woman I guess.

Inside the compound, you can meet people very easily. And there are always something on. Car boot sale, jazz night, Easter celebration etc. They have playgroups organised inside the compound. The British consulate has playgroup as well (in Jeddah). You can check out.

booksale

As a mother of young infant (11 months), I found it mission impossible to breastfeed when out and about. No facilities at all for breastfeeding. Toilets are usually not clean. No breastfeeding rooms. Um, not just breastfeeding, there is no facility for changing nappies as well. Now, I do both in the car if needed.

And Saudi road is not for walking. If you wanna go for a walk outside the compound with you baby in the pram, it's not easy of not impossible.

People are very friendly to our baby. Baby has got kisses, hugs, blessings and even presents (candies! Drinks! Toys!) from passers-by. We are happy with this. But I know some mammies don't like that.

By the way, I must say I'm not a westerner. I'm an Asian so I might draw less attention than the westerner women.

XTang

1) Compound life (in a good compound) is relaxing although you might go stir crazy after a while
2) You cannot drive
3) You need to wear the Abaya and cover your hair (more of a problem in Riyadh vs. other places)
4) You will attract attention, unwanted stares and comments from groups of frustrated Saudi young men who assume western women have loose morals.  This is not threatening or dangerous; merely an annoyance
5) As an expat woman, the only jobs you can get are teachers, nurses, doctors and stewardesses.  It's not easy to transfer Iqama from your husband to employer.  You would also need documentation duly attested by Saudi Embassy proving your credentials as, say, a teacher

freespirit1

I haven't moved there yet but I am very nervous. I should he arriving within the next two months. I think I'm getting cold feet!

khawarh624

dont be nervous it is fair enough to enjoy in compounds

rareshine

what things are you people reading? and i'm not even joking. Saudis are not foul people, haven't seen or heard any incidents.-- things are tighter now with the war in yemen but it is for your own protection. by tighter i mean more checkpoints...

as far as breastfeeding..the clothing is loose enough to do that comfortably where ever you are.

stressedmom

Have never covered my hair in almost a complete 2 years, but I keep a scarf in my purse in case a muttwa asks nicely/respectfully for me to cover. I am in Jeddah, but I know women who don't cover in Riyadh as well.

Abayas are required, but I do know women who wear long sleeves and long pants that are loose when they go to the malls instead of the abaya. Since I tend to wear shorts & or tees an abaya is easier. I picked up my first abaya on Amazon so I had it when I arrived, but many women just wear the long sleeves, long pants when they land and get an abaya within their first few days

Walking with prams in Jeddah is a nightmare as there are no real sidewalks almost anywhere except for the Corniche or in compounds. Riyadh has the DQ area to walk in.

People will try and cut in line no matter what. Especially in the grocery stores. I have learned to block.....except when they only have 1 or 2 items then I tell them to go ahead of me.

If you are moving to Jeddah join the blog Jeddah for Kids it is a life saver!!!!!!

karen carpenter

My advice
Don't worry too much.its not as bad as it seems.yes you have to wear an abaya.but you will get used to it
If you live on a compound its much much easier and you will quickly make friends
About work .its fairly hard for women to work .the ikharma is a problem but it might depend upon the place you work. And yes teaching is the best option as they are always looking for native speakers
But idisagree
not all men give preference to women
Some men expect to get served first just because they are men

But if you enjoy shopping then Saudi is the place to be

Good luck

NewinYanbu1961

Madame
If you live on a compound life will be much easier for you and your family.
As a single Western woman you would have had problems . As the religious police (yes you read it correctly) still rules supreme and takes their work at heart, however as a married woman you will be able - always accompanied by your husband- to practically go anywhere.

The abaya is a requirement and there is no getting around that .
Welcome to the Kingdom

noyp

women here in ksa can't walk alone without their husbands or close kin beside them..they can't join gathering for men, they are prohibited to talk to strangers especially males at all time..they are always encouraged to cover their faces inside or outside their homes..

rareshine

lol Can't walk alone? what the heck are you talking about? stop posting false information!

newtoalhasa

at noyp. That information is simply not true. As a western woman, you will want to wear an abaya. I have walked alone many times. no issue.
For the woman who posted the topic: I do not cover my face in any situations, and only cover my hair if I am in an area that is mostly male. Or if the religious police ask me. You can read my blog on life here at www.wifeabroad.wordpress.com
Life here is hard sometimes, and other times, it can be fun. If you were to live on a compound...inside the walls of that compound you do not have to wear the abaya. Only when you go out in public. Take everything with a grain of salt. Every person has a different experience. -Take care!
Also, you can find work here, it just might take longer. I have had opportunities to work since I got here (teaching english) but I just haven't felt passion about it. As far as the abaya goes. find one with a snap up front and it makes it much easier for putting on/taking off. You will find different things and different points of view all over the internet about life here. I caution and question anything that is fear based or very much anti woman. I haven't had a terrible life here, and while I miss driving and some freedoms that that can bring, having my husband with me is what makes it possible for me to stay. The support of loved ones is very important.

karen carpenter

Have to😄 disagree with other writer  you can go out with your friend your kids whatever and  of course you will talk to strange men in shops for example .and you don't have to cover your faces

newtoalhasa

I agree with you on that Karen.

bigbenman

I have to say the funniest thing I saw in one of the Riyadh Malls was a store selling Abaya's and Burkhas the name 'First Choice'  I almost took a picture then realised I was in Saudi and that might be considered offensive to some. I would say that during the holy month of Ramadan then dress code is more relevant and I had a few nurse friends that were shouted at by passing women from the back of passing cars. Also the Saudi men can take more than a passing interest, I made the mistake of buying roses for a girlfriend nurse id met (yes I know slapped wrist) anyway I am not married so for me as  a Christian I don't think I am breaking any rules. The mutawa tend not to harass couples of the same age/race. Back to the roses, in the 50M walk to the car I was  stopped by men in two cars asking for directions  to the air hostesses and nurses!!!    I did enjoy very much the walks in the dessert with the ex-pat hash, compound life, and of course making friends with different nationalities to enjoy the freedom associated with embassy parties. Actually I also started to do triathlons and the Riyadh road runners and Riyadh Wheelers also train regularly and in mixed groups on compound, at the british school which has a small 200M track) and on one of the date farms.  I have to  say I did have enormous fun in Saudi also we visited some of the coffee houses, Riyadh that's men only of course! There is everything to do (within limits) and I had a great time bot with my Saudi friends and on some of the ex pat nights. I stayed on Sedar Compound in 2009 - 2010. You just have to rub along with things, so when outside running I had short below the knee and a light weight sleeved top, used to run around the SAMA complex or around the Hospital (avoiding prayer time of course). Its a case of adapting and recognising that your in a very different but interestingly beautiful country. I bore my friends regularly with stories ! But it is like remembering school, some of the best days.    Oh and not to forget the Windmill bakery on Fridays. I want to come back lol !

Braveheart53

False information!

Braveheart53

False information. Probably to make some ppl nervous.

newtoalhasa

Braveheart53 wrote:

False information!


what is false information?

Braveheart53

It was the following msg posted by member "noyp" :
"women here in ksa can't walk alone without their husbands or close kin beside them..they can't join gathering for men, they are prohibited to talk to strangers especially males at all time..they are always encouraged to cover their faces inside or outside their homes.."

parveen banu

Can women do shopping alone without any escort?

newtoalhasa

Yes, women can shop alone. Be wise of your surroundings...But I shop alone from time to time and haven't had an issue.

Vivienne40

I am a woman in my late 40s  who is applying for a teaching position at a university, I believe in Rihyad. I expect I will be living at an aparment at the uni. But I plan on going alone, and I don't mind doing things alone. Thoughts from those of you living there? What should I expect?

rareshine

vivienne the whole post addresses your concern, read over it

khawarh624

all depends on individual and his socializing skills and confidence

Sunpflower

I'm with you, free Spirit! Supposed to be moving in August but as a single older woman I don't know if I can do this. KSA sounds terrible. I think I'm getting cold feet too!

Mariem88

Only a week here and I'm thinking of running away. It's a complete shocker of a place. So many donts for women. I hope I can handle this sooner before I crash on the floor.

elistaleb

Dear Sophie

You can boost your career here in Jeddah, no worries at all.

hamudi

Mariem88 wrote:

Only a week here and I'm thinking of running away. It's a complete shocker of a place. So many donts for women. I hope I can handle this sooner before I crash on the floor.


wha the heo...!!!

all such positive comments in this thread and u wanna run away?

freespirit1

I've heard terrible things about this country especially for women. I'm not too enthusiastic about it but I am curious and that's what's pushing me to go through with it

hamudi

freespirit1 wrote:

I've heard terrible things about this country especially for women. I'm not too enthusiastic about it but I am curious and that's what's pushing me to go through with it


U all hear terrible things but once you land and make the money no one complaints. Travels to dubai on weekends and what not.

What is worrying u? Freedom? Drive? Someone sexually assaulting u?

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