How to make friends in British Columbia

Hi!

I just joined this site a couple of days ago. I'm originally from the Philippines. I'd been in Canada for 3 years now and I am currently living in Victoria, the provincial capital of BC. I agree with Naomi and BillyM, it certainly is a lot harder to make friends in Canada, particularly in a small city like Victoria where everybody knows each other and have established friendships. It kind of creates a feeling like "I have my friends already, I don't need new ones" or something like that.

Don't get me wrong, Canadians are generally very nice, polite and friendly, certainly easy to get along with and strike up a conversation with. However, socially they are also a little bit reserved, distant and cliquish. There seems to be a compartmentalization of interaction i.e. you interact with them because they are part of your work life or school life or you play golf at the same club, go to the same gym but that's about it. Your interaction does not go beyond those boundaries or if they ever do, it can be awkward because your interaction has been removed from the common ground and transported some place else. Sorry I make them sound so dull and stiff but really they are not, they're fun and very egalitarian.

So the best places to meet people in Canada, particularly in BC will be in organized and compartmentalized interactions like work, school, church and any leisure type of activities like the golf course for example. I've met most of my friends and acquintances that way.

Hi.  I'e been in Canada with my husband and 2 kids for exactly two years now.  I agree with the earlier comments about compartments.  The contacts I make at school don't generally seem to go any further than there.  We've been invited my husband's colleagues home for Thanksgiving though, and hosted a small Burn's Night last year.  This year I didn't feel like doing it again though.  I feel a bit like I've come to some sort of glass ceiling beyond which 1st generation migrants can't pass.  I'm currently looking for employment and hope this will improve matters.  I'm off to access that website - Meetup.com now too, thanks!

Hello. Im from Philippines and wille be moving there as soon as my visa is approve. My husband lives in Maple Ridge. SOunds country side. Due to some reasons i dont wanna be a plain housewife. Im very young And i wanna make friends to people older than me. Pls Respond to this message.

Ms. C

bcmom870 wrote:

Hi.  I'e been in Canada with my husband and 2 kids for exactly two years now.  I agree with the earlier comments about compartments.  The contacts I make at school don't generally seem to go any further than there.  We've been invited my husband's colleagues home for Thanksgiving though, and hosted a small Burn's Night last year.  This year I didn't feel like doing it again though.  I feel a bit like I've come to some sort of glass ceiling beyond which 1st generation migrants can't pass.  I'm currently looking for employment and hope this will improve matters.  I'm off to access that website - Meetup.com now too, thanks!

We missed our Burn's supper this year too!  Last year we were introduced to a local Scottish butcher who prepared a wonderful haggis for us.... which we shared with a couple that had recently immigrated to the valley. 

Since you live in Kelowna, have you checked out the website called AccessOkanagan.com?  There's local residents sharing information with people relocating to the valley and it might be a good place to meet new friends too. 

Feel free to send along a message to me! 

bcmom870 wrote:

I feel a bit like I've come to some sort of glass ceiling beyond which 1st generation migrants can't pass.  I'm currently looking for employment and hope this will improve matters.  I'm off to access that website - Meetup.com now too, thanks!

*its not just migrants--I was born here(though parents migrated here) and  have faced it for decades. I tried ads, volunteering, courses, you name it. Always been incredibly tough. Judging from the popularity of personal ad services around here I think many locals also face the same thing, even if they work or are in school.
Canada has lots of issues that separate it from other english-speaking countries  but specifically BC people tend to be simple, passive, they aren't ambitious or intellectually curious, and they aren't very self-examining. It was founded as a labor province and has not really changed. Labor and nature tourism.
9/10 of the time if there is something unusual or interesting going on as an activity a non-local started it.
You can take courses-lectures, or try meetup groups but if you compare them to ones in other places you can see the energy level is different and it is very hard connecting with others.
And because new arrivals have to follow the culture-they end up adopting the same attitude so it gets reinforced.

Hi everyone,

I've recently moved to Vancouver from the states and must say that people here are very friendly. However, I've been having some difficulty making friends beyond the acquaintance level.

I've found meetup.com to be helpful in meeting new people as well as a site called nuuly.com. I found nuuly to be more local and focused than meetup.

I hope to meet everyone here for a beer one of these days. Please feel free to drop me an email!

Best,
Tommy

Hi kamelaouina and welcome to Expat.com!

Why don't you start a new thread in the forum for better visibility?

It may help,
Harmonie.

hello everyone I am a professor of sports tennis instructor I wonder if I could find a tennis club or a private school to teach knowing that my wife will be in Kuwait in September thank you in advance

Hello - I am a Canadian and am sad to see the posts above that Canadians are friendly but are "not the best of friends".  I have seen that to be true too...I do have a lot of good friends but I have found that I must be the one who "calls to stay in touch".  Seldom do I get these calls myself. I think Canadians hide in their cocoons and hope problems will go away.  This same cocooning behaviour has made it so we don't reach out to others and become the "best friend" that we could be.  Something we could all work on!

Hi Ricia,

I saw you on the Expat Forum.

There you are ... famous.

JIm