Spending one month here, another there, and traversing the globe in six months, with perhaps a stop in your home country for Christmas—it's challenging to keep track of your whereabouts. Rather than using a tracking device, your friends keep in touch through emails and calls. However, your frequent travel gradually alters the nature of your friendships. This transformation isn't instantaneous; it evolves slowly through repeated moves abroad. Let's take a closer look.
You're never present
You're constantly on the move. This phrase might sound familiar to you. Friendships can struggle to withstand the distance, and your loved ones often mention they learn more about you from your social media than through direct conversations. They've noted your diligence in updating all your social channels—at least one post a day, they've counted—but your delay in responding to their emails often takes a week by their measure. Caught in the act, you appear at best as a scatterbrained traveler and, at worst, as a snobbish expatriate.
This pattern is a surefire way to alienate friends back home. Although digital nomadism has gained popularity post-pandemic, it still irritates some. Digital nomads are frequently criticized as consumers, detached from genuine values, and contributors to pollution—labels you know don't fit you or your friendships. Yet, as your friends witness changes in your behavior, these stereotypes might begin to seem more believable. Your prolonged silences and absences raise concerns, particularly as you remain highly active on social media, and not always for work purposes.
You prioritize online presence
Digital nomadism has honed your socializing skills. You've become adept at nurturing long-distance friendships and mastering digital communications like no other. But are you too focused on social media? You acknowledge your shortcomings while justifying your choices. Social media enables you to reach the masses efficiently—it's not necessary to send a personalized email every time you switch countries. However, you reserve those emails—and even phone calls—for those you truly consider close friends. Essentially, your approach to managing relationships virtually helps you differentiate between casual acquaintances, travel buddies, and lifelong friends.
Travel transforms you into a versatile socializer
Digital nomadism often tells a story of varying degrees of loneliness. While loneliness isn't inherently harmful—often providing much-needed tranquility—it can become oppressive if it's not what you desire. This lifestyle compels you to reach out and forge new connections, not just with fellow nomads or foreigners. You didn't move abroad to mingle exclusively with expats; you sought professional and personal experience in a new country. Regular interactions with a diverse range of people have enhanced your capacity to socialize effortlessly, quickly adapting to different social terrains.
Distance favors deeper relationships
Paradoxically, distance can deepen connections with those who were once mere acquaintances. When embarking on your digital nomad journey, you pledge to stay in touch—after all, what could be easier in today's digital age? Yet, as time progresses, these contacts may dwindle, catching you off guard with the literal and metaphorical distance that forms between you and "your friends."
Simultaneously, you notice individuals with whom you previously had superficial interactions reaching out. It's unclear who initiated it—whether it was the first email, a comment on a social media post, or something else. But from this, a profound connection emerges that surprises and gratifies you. You didn't engage deeply back home, but now, as a digital nomad, you find yourself discussing significant topics with them. This evolution also helps you distinguish between genuine friends and mere acquaintances.
You are regularly sorting out friends from here and there
Updates aren't only essential for computers, smartphones, and tablets. The hard drive of friendship also requires regular maintenance. As you move from one country to another, your circle expands dramatically—you meet thousands, double your contacts, and triple your invitations to parties and events, both in-person and online. Naturally, you can't attend them all, and sometimes, you don't even recall who the invites are from.
In one instance, you might connect so well with someone in a foreign country that others assume you're family. Yet, the next day, it feels as if you've never met. Conversely, there are friendships you expect to dissolve due to relocation, yet these bonds persist across borders. Of course, some relationships do indeed end with your constant moves, just as others begin and flourish in the host country.
Such dynamics necessitate frequent updates to your network of friends. While some digital nomads worry about seeming pretentious and opt to clutter their contact lists with cursory "hellos," it's healthier to be forthright. If your only exchanges are brief greetings sent every few years, there's no real connection remaining. It's better to reduce unnecessary digital clutter and end things amicably, saving everyone from pointless messages.
Learning to distinguish 'travel friends' from 'friends'
What truly defines a friendship? Is it possible to consider someone a friend if you only speak a few times a year? Do the friends who remained in your home country still count as friends? Are the friendships formed in host countries genuine?
Many digital nomads relate that they have formed strong bonds with locals and other expatriates during their time abroad. These relationships were often informal and acknowledged as likely to end with their departure—a mutual understanding that brought no hard feelings or regrets once they moved on, without any promises to stay in touch. Occasionally, contact might sporadically rekindle, and to these nomads, these are indeed friendships—effortless "travel friendships" devoid of heavy commitments, much simpler to manage than the burdensome ties some people maintain.
Whether labeled as "travel friends," "friends," "friends from the home country," or "close ones," the essence lies in mutual understanding and the recognition that travel inevitably shapes your perceptions of friendship and relationships. This awareness is crucial for gaining perspective and making sound choices. Moving abroad doesn't just change you—it also alters your connections. The end of a travel friendship—or any friendship, for that matter—isn't necessarily due to a fallout; sometimes, it's merely the conclusion of a chapter.
Digital nomadism takes you out of your comfort zone
Digital nomadism reshapes your understanding of social relationships: acquaintances, friends, travel friends, people from here, from there, etc. It demands more flexibility, tolerance, and introspection. The same processes you undergo—sorting friends, reallocating "space" to them—are mirrored by others in their own ways.
Moreover, digital nomadism poses a continual cultural challenge. The ways people forge friendships can vary greatly by culture. While you carry the norms of your home country, those you meet carry theirs, which can put your self-esteem to the test. For example, you might see a reaction as rejection when, in that person's culture, it's a commonplace gesture. These cultural misunderstandings can even complicate relationships with friends from your own culture, where a delayed email reply might be interpreted as a sulk or snub, whereas your friend could simply be busy. Distance can obscure the realities of their daily lives, leading the human brain to assume the worst often.
To maintain a positive outlook, be proactive. Embrace the challenge that digital nomadism presents to step outside your comfort zone. Engage in social spaces like coworking areas and cafes, and participate in group activities. These are ways to immerse yourself in the local culture and build new relationships without pressure. Let yourself flow with the rhythm of your travels—embracing the art of letting go is key to thriving in your nomadic lifestyle and maintaining healthy friendships.
