Should expats feel guilty about taking vacations?

The myth of the 'perpetually on vacation' expat

It's a common misconception that expats are always on holiday. This stereotype can lead to unwarranted jokes and comments, questioning the necessity of your vacation days. However, a quick review of your employment contract will clarify that you, like any other employee, are indeed entitled to time off. The real issue stems from a widespread misunderstanding.

Living as an expat, particularly in a tourist destination or a picturesque locale, might give others the impression that your life is one long vacation. This perception can induce guilt about using your rightful vacation days, as it appears to be just another perk of expat life. However, residing in a sought-after spot doesn't mean you're exempt from the daily grind. You're engaged in regular work, not perpetual leisure—even retirees have schedules to keep. If vacation time is justified for everyone else, it's certainly justified for you, too.

The guilt of an expat 'proving themselves'

For expats, guilt over taking vacations can often be traced back to perceived expectations from colleagues. You may feel a twinge of guilt seeing others forego their own breaks. In Japan, for instance, cultural pressures lead many to leave vacation days unused, despite being technically available. This sentiment is echoed in the United States, where taking time off can mistakenly be seen as laziness, resulting in less than half of employees using their full vacation entitlement. Similarly, in countries like Mexico or Singapore, limited vacation days keep workers tied to their desks, and even in the UK or New Zealand, not all entitled leave is taken.

As a foreign worker, the concern about standing out by taking your full vacation entitlement can be daunting. It's important to remember that local practices are often influenced by factors beyond individual choice, such as economic constraints or cultural expectations. Some colleagues might prefer to take more time off if they could.

The guilt you feel may also stem from a personal desire to prove your dedication, especially if you're new to the company or aiming for a promotion. You might fear that utilizing all your vacation days could send the wrong message—that you're not fully committed. However, it's crucial to recognize that taking time off is a right and part of maintaining a healthy work-life balance. It's not an indicator of laziness but a necessary aspect of personal well-being and professional sustainability.

How not to feel guilty about taking vacations

Feeling guilty about taking a vacation is common, but there are effective ways to manage this feeling to truly enjoy your time off. Remember, the primary purpose of a vacation is to rest, and resting should never be associated with guilt.

Dispel the fear of job loss due to taking a vacation

The anxiety of an expat needing to prove their worth can be overwhelming, but it's important to put these fears to rest. It's improbable that you'll return to a termination notice. Vacations are a time for rejuvenation; your employer will likely appreciate the renewed energy and fresh ideas you bring back to work. Allow yourself to take the rest you deserve without guilt.

However, guilt might still creep in if you notice discrepancies in how vacation rights are applied among employees, whether they're fellow expats or locals. If you see that not everyone is afforded the same rights as stated in their contracts, it's natural to feel uneasy. This is an indication of an underlying issue at your workplace, not a reflection of your personal work ethic.

If this is the case, consider investigating discreetly either before you leave or upon your return. Ask why some employees' rights are not being honored. Is there an unofficial policy that discriminates against certain groups? Could your expatriate status be unfairly benefiting you?

Approach management to discuss these disparities. Advocating for fair treatment for all employees can not only help address any injustices but also improve the overall work environment and relations among staff. Ultimately, a fair and respectful workplace benefits everyone, including the company's bottom line.

Don't just be absent, be completely unavailable

Research indicates that many employees struggle to fully disconnect while on vacation. The tendency to check emails, send a quick reply, skim a brief report, or draft a short memo can disrupt your relaxation—even if you're nestled in a meadow or lounging by the sea. These tasks might seem minor and give you a momentary sense of accomplishment, but they detract from the true purpose of a vacation.

Engaging in work tasks during your time off doesn't add as much value as you think. It might feel satisfying to respond quickly and think you can go back to your summer relaxation uninterrupted, but this habit undermines the very essence of a vacation. Being on leave means stepping away from work responsibilities entirely, not just physically but mentally as well.

By trying to be the diligent expat worker, even when you're supposed to be resting, you risk turning your break into a working holiday. This not only defeats the purpose of the vacation but can leave you just as exhausted as you were before taking time off. Your colleagues might still see you as worn out, which can affect your productivity and creativity upon returning. Remember, when you're on vacation, you're not just absent—you are truly unavailable. This complete disconnection is crucial for returning to work refreshed and reenergized.

Disconnect from everything work-related

One surefire way to spoil your vacation with guilt is by remaining tethered to your job. Keeping up with social media and emails might make you feel responsible or even indispensable when you tell colleagues, "I'll be available just in case." However, ask yourself what real emergencies require immediate attention while you're supposed to be off. True, urgent situations may arise, but unless the company's survival is at stake, your vacation should not include work.

Labeling routine queries as emergencies, such as a colleague asking for a reminder about next week's schedule, is a common trap. These are not emergencies; your team can handle them without your input.

Fully disconnecting is challenging, particularly when your personal phone also serves as your work device. While you don't need to uninstall all your applications, you should certainly turn off your notifications. If an email arrives, you won't receive an alert, reducing the temptation to check. Resist the urge to even open your email app. Stand firm in your resolve.

Remember, working abroad does not negate your right to a proper vacation. Use this time to truly step away from work commitments, allowing you to recharge fully and return with renewed vigor.

Practical tips for a guilt-free vacation

Taking a vacation doesn't mean you're abandoning your responsibilities—it's about organizing your absence to ensure everything runs smoothly while you're away. Here's how to effectively disconnect without leaving your team in the lurch:

1. Before you leave, have a meeting to discuss urgent matters, locate important files, and decide what can wait until you return. This clarifies priorities and ensures you're not contacted for minor issues.
2. Empower your colleagues by delegating tasks and responsibilities during your absence. They should be equipped and confident to handle day-to-day decisions without relying on you, which is critical for their growth and your peace of mind.
3. Create a clear out-of-office message for your email, indicating the duration of your absence and who to contact for immediate issues. This sets expectations and directs queries to the appropriate person while you're away.
4. Update your voicemail with a message that you are out of the office, including your return date and alternative contact details. This prevents the buildup of messages waiting for your return and informs callers of whom to reach out to in your absence.

Self-employed expats: Embracing time off without guilt

Self-employed expats, including digital nomads, deserve vacations just as much as anyone else. When you're self-employed, the concept of taking a break can sometimes be misunderstood—by others and even yourself. There's a common misconception that vacations are unnecessary without set office hours. This fear of losing clients or suffering a dip in income, compounded by possible criticism from those who might see you as perpetually on holiday, can make the idea of a vacation seem impractical.

To combat these feelings of guilt, it's important to recognize that your business is not merely a hobby; it's a serious commitment. Often, self-employed expats put in more hours than their salaried counterparts, blurring the lines between work and personal life. Taking time off is essential for mental clarity and organization. Like expat employees, there are effective strategies to maximize vacation benefits without compromising your professional life.

Practical tips for planning your time off

• Managing your finances and expenses in advance is crucial. As a self-employed individual, stepping away could mean a temporary loss of income. Budgeting for your vacation helps mitigate this impact.
• Avoid the pitfall of scrambling to fund your vacation at the last minute. Cultivate the habit of regular saving, irrespective of your vacation plans.
• Ensure all ongoing projects are completed before your departure to avoid unsettling clients and leaving work unfinished.
• Notify your clients well in advance of your break. If they're accustomed to frequent interactions, this heads-up allows them to prepare accordingly.
• Make it clear that your absence is temporary—a mere three weeks, not three years. This reassurance can help maintain trust and stability in your professional relationships.

Being present without being there: A necessity for self-employed expats

For independent professionals, a near-constant online presence is often essential (social media, blogs, websites, etc.). To maintain this while you are on vacation, you should prepare by scheduling all your posts in advance. Record your podcasts, write your blog posts, and plan your social media updates, then set them to go live during your absence. For email communications, establish automatic responses to inform your contacts of your temporary unavailability.

If you're concerned about losing clients or missing out on a significant contract, consider permitting yourself a "mini" connection while away. Although you are on vacation, dedicating a few hours each week to check your emails or pursue new client opportunities can be beneficial. However, it's crucial to ensure that these few designated hours do not extend into full workdays.

The seven rules for enjoying your vacation as an expat

1. Let go of guilt: Feeling guilty does not enhance productivity. Remember, guilt isn't a measure of your commitment to work; it's more likely to spoil your time off.
2. Trust your team: Your employer managed before your arrival and will manage during your absence. This understanding should help ease any concerns about stepping away.
3. Value your vacation: Remember, your vacation isn't a concession; it's earned. You're not just spending money on it; you're investing in your well-being. Embrace and enjoy every moment.
4. Respect choices: If your expatriate colleagues opt not to take their vacations, respect their choice but also stand firm in your decision to take yours. Your approach might even inspire others to reconsider their own.
5. Dismiss the labels: Taking time off does not equate to laziness—it's your right. Tune out any office gossip that suggests otherwise.
6. Embrace the benefits: Understand that taking a break can boost your creativity and productivity. This isn't just good for you; it's beneficial for your company too.
7. Enjoy without reservation: Your vacation is a time for rest and rejuvenation. Make the most of it without dwelling on what you 'should' be doing instead.