Gifts for girlfriend's parents and siblings

Remember if you spend a lot of money now, they will expect it all the time, so buy something simple, maybe something special from your country. Or just take them out for a nice meal.

@cougarcar20

I'm going into this knowing that. I'm well aware that it's best to not raise expectations.

Ok fine so what would you buy your American girlfriends' parent and siblings when you first meet them?

@jamespryder

Best to ask your GF to see what the family wants.  If they ask for expensive gifts then run and don't look back.  In VN, sometimes in-laws or GF's family think they can milk a foreigner as much as they want but of course not all are like that.

    I am from the US and will be visiting my girlfriend for a few months in Haiphong. Are there any suggestions regarding appropriate gifts for the various family members? This will be my first return trip since meeting her a few months ago so it's not like we're engaged or anything but she's very important to me and I'd like to make a good impression on her family without going overboard. Thanks for your help folks
   

    -@jamespryder

At this point in your relationship, only give gifts to the parents and make them simple but nice, such as imported tea, fine chocolate, etc.

You "might" give lucky money 🧧 gifts to the others at Tết.

        I am from the US and will be visiting my girlfriend for a few months in Haiphong. Are there any suggestions regarding appropriate gifts for the various family members? This will be my first return trip since meeting her a few months ago so it's not like we're engaged or anything but she's very important to me and I'd like to make a good impression on her family without going overboard. Thanks for your help folks        -@jamespryder

At this point in your relationship, only give gifts to the parents and make them simple but nice, such as imported tea, fine chocolate, etc.

You "might" give lucky money 🧧 gifts to the others at Tết.
   

    -@OceanBeach92107

Maximum 200K as lucky money if she is decent person to you  haha, I dated once single mum, she was good looking lied to me here and there, tried bit to control me,  and she was bothering me all the time with requests for lucky money during Tet , I gave her 2K, call me asshole if you like.

call me asshole if you like.
   
    -@narcrepellant2525

The forum code of conduct doesn't allow that, but believe me, many of your posts about Vietnamese women have had me tempted to do just that.

Everyone is entitled to an opinion in the forum (within the constraints of the code of conduct) no matter how inappropriate it might seem to others.

I just wonder if you've ever considered that maybe you get what you give, and your low opinion of all women (yes, you've definitely written that previously) ironically causes you to gravitate toward those who are fully prepared to meet your expectations?

...I gave her 2K, call me asshole if you like.
        -@narcrepellant2525

2K?! I mean, seriously, 2K?!!

LOL! 2K = ~8 cents

Lucky money (li xi) to the Vietnamese is a serious thing, especially during Tet.  I have seen families saving all year long just to have enough to give out when visiting friends and relatives.  As the economy boosted within the last ten years or so, people expected li xi to also go up.

    Lucky money (li xi) to the Vietnamese is a serious thing, especially during Tet.  I have seen families saving all year long just to have enough to give out when visiting friends and relatives.  As the economy boosted within the last ten years or so, people expected li xi to also go up.        -@yng68bld

We give every year, but we give only to the children of friends, family and of friendly neighbours, and to the elderly family members who we feel are in need. 200K per red envelope for the kiddies, 500K for the old folks. Last year the total disbursed was ~10 million.

I have never received a red lucky money envelope (not that we need it, though there's times where the lucky part would have come in handy).

    I am from the US and will be visiting my girlfriend for a few months in Haiphong. Are there any suggestions regarding appropriate gifts for the various family members? This will be my first return trip since meeting her a few months ago so it's not like we're engaged or anything but she's very important to me and I'd like to make a good impression on her family without going overboard. Thanks for your help folks
   

    -@jamespryder

Forget the gifts, get your GF to rent a VIP mini bus & take them all down the nearest set price "all you can eat & drink karaoke joint" & you pay for it. You will be a living legend with the family & in the village. Also for your own entertainment, sit back & watch, you will be amazed  ....& money well spent!

@cougarcar20

I wouldn't buy them anything but then again it's not really an American custom. I'm just trying to go with what's customary and expected.

It used to be just a dozen oranges  or apples (VN custom) when coming to a GF's home, but as a foreigner you are expected to be different.  LoL if you want something out of the ordinary, just bring some chocolate.

     call me asshole if you like.        -@narcrepellant2525 The forum code of conduct doesn't allow that, but believe me, many of your posts about Vietnamese women have had me tempted to do just that. Everyone is entitled to an opinion in the forum (within the constraints of the code of conduct) no matter how inappropriate it might seem to others. I just wonder if you've ever considered that maybe you get what you give, and your low opinion of all women (yes, you've definitely written that previously) ironically causes you to gravitate toward those who are fully prepared to meet your expectations?         -@OceanBeach92107

I have no clue, but I was always decent to women, now I changed MO. I have low opinion about majority of  women no race or nationality specific,  that's true.  I dated few nasty examples from female world and have now extremely minimal tolerance for nonsense. YMMV. So you always dated nice women?

   
     call me asshole if you like.        -@narcrepellant2525 The forum code of conduct doesn't allow that, but believe me, many of your posts about Vietnamese women have had me tempted to do just that. Everyone is entitled to an opinion in the forum (within the constraints of the code of conduct) no matter how inappropriate it might seem to others. I just wonder if you've ever considered that maybe you get what you give, and your low opinion of all women (yes, you've definitely written that previously) ironically causes you to gravitate toward those who are fully prepared to meet your expectations?         -@OceanBeach92107
I have no clue, but I was always decent to women, now I changed MO. I have low opinion about majority of  women no race or nationality specific,  that's true.  I dated few nasty examples from female world and have now extremely minimal tolerance for nonsense. YMMV. So you always dated nice women?
   

    -@narcrepellant2525

Oh no, not at all.

I've just adopted a mindset of praising the women for any successes and blaming myself for the failures.

I'm deep in the middle of success now, so it's easy for me to adopt a magnanimous attitude toward my wife and other women while casting a critical eye on your comments.

Who am I to judge, eh?

I do admire your willingness to be absolutely honest about your view of all women, even if it appears to be grossly distorted (from my POV).

You probably will have better results being a "Bad Boy", though I doubt that's the way to be successful with the best of the best.

The ones you catch will be appropriate for the bait you use.

Cheers!

I have no problems to praise anybody, including women, I admire people who against all odds achieve success and inner peace with themselves, peace with their surroundings.  These few I dated were mostly envious about my dreams, success. Being sarcastic, trying to humiliate me. Trying to "warn me" that I will fail in this and that. I am not nasty MF, maybe I used  wrong expressions, but I do not tolerate lies, control, micromanagement by woman, cheating and majority I met are like these. Maybe you are just born under more luckier star and in the better country ha?

@jamespryder

Gift is gift, it show that you care about them. So not the value of the gift but the meaning of the gift.

You have to understand their family members, such as her parents get any problem on the health or not, then can buy a heart mesurement, her brother go exercise or not then can buy a sport watch... or cheaper, just some unique cake from your country.

Choose the present base on your income and how you love them, dont care much about the price, bcz if she love you she wont care abt money, and if you love her you also want to give her the best of yours.

Never give money - they will milk you non stop.

Give them something very simple like a white, plain Chinese tea set; in Vietnam, their tea sets are unwashed and filthy.

Even something like a long, slightly padded cushion of for those ostentatious rock hard wooden chairs and sofas that they have

I've had so many helpful suggestions on here. Since I was married to a Hong Kong Chinese for 25 years before she passed away. I'm very familiar with relationships good and bad. I had many friends who met ladies for Asia. With all sorts of results .

The lady I have met I believe to be truly in sincerely not interested in money and quite naive and loving. I find her extremely lovable and want to be sure I treat her and her parents well without being stupidly generous.

Local delicacies or small tokens representing your hometown can be charming gestures.