Indonesian Divorce

It's easy.

She files for abandonment (or whatever).

He can dispute it but passport data will show they were apart

The judge may order a 3 (?) month waiting if he is that way out.

A 6 year separation might be enough for her to win hands down

If the husband doesn't go to court or can't be found, the divorce is generally automatic.

Custody of any kids can be resolved in or out of court but they generally go to the mother unless there are circumstances that makes it problematical

Thanks.

I think she does have good grounds to file for divorce.  The islamic factor did concern me though , putting more weight on the husband's decision?!

I believe he will attend court, he is close by, just that he wouldn't agree to her divorce and say he wants to stay married. Fight it the whole time, not agreeing to anything, while still attending court.  And he seems to not want anything to do with their child, never sees them or support them. She's not interested in child support either... plus no assets to split or anything.  I think he has no money...

I've read some can get divorced in a couple months, while others can take years when the husband doesn't agree.

Based on this situation, how long do you think it will take?

Thanks!

Tough question.

Mine took 2 months but I didn't turn up because I wanted out.

If I'd argued, it would have been closer to six months.

6 months is ok.  I was scared when i heard others taking 2+ years because the husband wouldn't agree.

We haven't met yet, I'm in a different country waiting/hoping, but I've been talking to her for 6 months now... hoping to get married.

This seems more like a simple divorce, since they've been apart for so long without contact, and no assets to split.  Their child may create issues but he hasn't tried to contact them in 6 years and has provided no support.

Do you think she'll be ok to go through this alone, or will a lawyer be needed?  I'm just worried with him not agreeing while still attending, or saying the time apart was for working abroad (but zero contact for 6 years should help her case)...  6 months is understandable, but 2+ years does scare me so I'm really hoping that's not the case here.

Thanks again!!

6 years sounds like a good idea in this case.

Something smells very wrong.

They were just both working abroad. 

She had issues with his and his family's treatment towards her, so she went back to her parents.  That's why she has witnesses ready to talk on that.  He then left her and went to another country to work and provided no support and no contract...so she was forced to go work abroad a year later to help her kid and family. 

He's been back in indo for 2 years now, still with no contact, while living 2 minutes away from her family and their son.  She's been back about a month,  and looking to divorce.  She went over and spoke to him last week, hoping he would agree to make it easier, but he just wanted her back and said he would fight it.  She's done though and ready to file alone without lawyer .

Hopefully this goes smoothly and won't take too long!

Something smells very wrong.
   

    -@Fred

What do you mean by this?! Should I be worried?

    Something smells very wrong.         -@Fred

What do you mean by this?! Should I be worried?
   

    -@IndoLoveInWaiting

You have never met her, nor do you seem to have visited Indonesia

She's a Muslim - That means you must convert (at least on paper) in order to marry

In the case of a divorce, she gets 50% of everything unless you have a prenup

She has a sob story - Always watch out for them

If the husband (assuming he actually exists) is vindictive, he might be in a position to cause problems.

The divorce story is off. She could have dumped him for abandonment at any time. That many years and him abroad would have been a quickie job.

At the very best, and assuming you have a very open mind and sense of adventure, you're in for some  culture shocks

Ask her to send a copy of the marriage books and court papers. If there are any excuses for not doing so, run

Thank you. I do appreciate you looking out for me.

1. That's true we have never met in person. We do video call everyday while she worked abroad and since being back in Indonesia.  We've both spoken to each others families, kids, and friends - so everyone knows our intentions to marry. We're all Facebook friends with our siblings and I've spoken to her mom about our desire to wed as well - she just wants her to finalize divorce before us meeting.  With her on video call, I attended her dad's funeral who just passed recently - including the event 40 days after.  We're extremely close and open.

2.  I am Muslim as well.

3.  I do understand the possibility of divorce and losing 50%. A prenup will most likely be a must.

4.  The husband did say he wouldn't agree to anythin after she said she would be filing for divorce.  I assume he'll be vindictive. That's where my concern over divorce timeline comes - will it be 6 months or could it be years because of him???!!

5.  She was working abroad the whole time.  She was hopeful he would reach out and make an effort, but he never did.  So she was ready to divorce him before we even started talking and getting close.  Once her contact ended, she returned home and talked to him right away, with her mum and brother,  and is now moving quickly to start the divorce process.

6.  I've seen the marriage contract and pictures.  She says she'll file her application next week and I'm certain she'll show me. If there are any delays, i certainly would be concerned with the red flag. I understand the sob story worry, but I do trust her while still being cautious.

7.  Speaking for so long, and moreso in the last couple months - I'm definitely seeing the cultural and way of lifestyle differences. It's a lot. Once the divorce is over, our plan is for her to visit me in Canada for several months, get to know each other more and make sure we're happy and ready to marry.  Then both return to Indonesia, spend time with her family and get married.  Then return to Canada to live here permanently with her and her child - so I know she'll have a different upbringing and thought process, but I wouldn't be living in Indo with the cultural shock.

I do appreciate you mentioning these things, and if there are any more, please do share.  I know there's no certainty,  but I am hopeful while remaining cautious.

Thanks again!!

Excuse me. I am urgently looking for a person to accompany me as a translator in a meeting. I know how to speak Indonesian and Spanish - if you know English it would also be a plus. I only need Indonesian to Spanish. I am in Bali. Kuta. Thank you.

Based on everything, does anyone else have an opinion on the divorce timeline?!

She's filling a Divorce Claim alone, and he'll attend but fight it each step.  No assets, 1 child he never sees, and he has never provided support for either. They live 2 minutes apart...

I've heard a finalized divorce could take a couple months and i've heard others taking years....

What do you think it most likely will be?

Would having a lawyer make the process any quicker?

I'm thinking with no assets and most likely obvious ground for divorce she won't need one and should be fine doing it alone.  Keeping emotions out of it and remaining business like...

Any women here who filed the Divorce Claim themselves that could share their experiences? Thanks!

    Excuse me. I am urgently looking for a person to accompany me as a translator in a meeting. I know how to speak Indonesian and Spanish - if you know English it would also be a plus. I only need Indonesian to Spanish. I am in Bali. Kuta. Thank you.
   

    -@cindy rangel

Excuse me Miss but you're in the wrong carriage. The topic is Indonesian Divorce