Troubled and Confused

laststanding · 2017-08-21T02:07:41+02:00

Just wanting to get some opinions from people out there. So here is my situation and please feel free to express opinions. Ok here it is and see ! A year and a half ago I married my Vietnamese girlfriend of 4 years. Our relationship and experience with her family was great. We had a lot of fun and enjoyed every minute together. Now she lives in Vietnam and I live in the US. We have been going through the immigration process for the last year. I make the trip back to Vietnam every 3 months and stay for a month. Now 4 months ago she started a job at a bar working nights. And ever since her attitude behavior has changed. This once sweet and amazing woman has become someone else. She often does not contact me for days. Does not like when i call her the same sweet names a couple uses. She rarely wears her engagement ring and wedding band. She has told me that she doesn't because of work and crime issues about the rings. She tells me that she is always tired and feels exhausted . Which is the reason she rarely contacts me. But I have to say, I feel my wife has fallen into the bar scene and become someone else. I don't feel that she has the same feelings for me and doesn't want to be married to me. We are almost finished with the immigration process. ( Waiting for the interview) I still love this woman and care for her. I have talked to others about this, with varied opinions. But there are not familiar with Vietnam and Vietnamese. I have tried to talk to her and express my feelings about what is going on. But she tells me she is to tired to discuss it and I'm over reacting. At this point I'm thinking of filing for a divorce and cancelling the immigration petition. So am I over reating or do I have real concern?

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Canman63 Contributor

Member since 19 April 2019

Canman63Contributor26 August 2019 16:03:37

#81

154

She goes to work at a bar? Doesn't wear her ring? Doesn't contact you?
Too tired to talk?
Hate to break the news to you bud!

Ciambella ViP

Member since 19 April 2017

CiambellaViP26 August 2019 17:28:46

#82

3482

Canman63 wrote:
She goes to work at a bar? Doesn't wear her ring? Doesn't contact you?
Too tired to talk?
Hate to break the news to you bud!

If you meant to address the OP of this thread, he's long gone. There was more to the story than he told us and he left halfway through the conversation.

Canman63 Contributor

Member since 19 April 2019

Canman63Contributor26 August 2019 18:47:01

#83

154

Ciambella wrote:
Canman63 wrote:
She goes to work at a bar? Doesn't wear her ring? Doesn't contact you?
Too tired to talk?
Hate to break the news to you bud!

If you meant to address the OP of this thread, he's long gone. There was more to the story than he told us and he left halfway through the conversation.

Yes I could imagine, he came looking for advice and got it. Perhaps not what he was wanting to hear, but what he already believed. Best of luck to him.

Rahj_Devon Contributor

Member since 26 July 2019

Rahj_DevonContributor26 August 2019 19:21:23

#84

100

Ciambella wrote:
Canman63 wrote:
She goes to work at a bar? Doesn't wear her ring? Doesn't contact you?
Too tired to talk?
Hate to break the news to you bud!

If you meant to address the OP of this thread, he's long gone. There was more to the story than he told us and he left halfway through the conversation.

Ciambella.... I am sorry but what does "OP" stand for? lol..... I keep hearing everybody using these two letter term but couldn't follow.....

Canman63 Contributor

Member since 19 April 2019

Canman63Contributor26 August 2019 22:34:27

#85

154

Opening poster.

Rahj_Devon Contributor

Member since 26 July 2019

Rahj_DevonContributor26 August 2019 22:50:21

#86

100

Canman63 wrote:
Opening poster.

Gotcha.... Thank you!

WillyBaldy Serial expat

Member since 26 August 2013

WillyBaldySerial expat27 August 2019 00:26:32

#87

727

I thought "o" was for "original"

Canman63 Contributor

Member since 19 April 2019

Canman63Contributor27 August 2019 02:15:04

#88

154

Yes, original.

Ciambella ViP

Member since 19 April 2017

CiambellaViP27 August 2019 02:24:55

#89

3482

Rahj_Devon wrote:
Ciambella.... I am sorry but what does "OP" stand for? lol..... I keep hearing everybody using these two letter term but couldn't follow.....

It's Original Poster, the person who starts the thread.

KruChris Serial expat

Member since 29 April 2016

KruChrisSerial expat30 August 2019 18:20:00

#90

301

Well, I would take a few days' leavwe, book a return flight and see for yourself.

Then I would cancel the Immigration process first and play it cool regarding a divorce.
...
I might as well share my own experience. Although my wife was a citizen and needed no Green Card.

* There was no response (and she has had 2 phones, broadband at home & wifi @ work). It was about booking holidays in Europe. She could have answered in the bathroom.

No response for days => I asked [i]do you want a divorce[i] and the rest is history.

People pay for sham marriages - enough said.

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