Menu
Expat.com

Vietnamese ladies and their "dead" husbands...

Last activity 08 October 2019 by WillyBaldy

Post new topic

Guestposter822

After asking me for a coffee and upon querying a Vietnamese lady told me that her husband was dead. A few days later though I received a nasty email from her so called husband saying he was going to get his crazy on if I continued to go out with his wife. I didn't want to find out what this actually meant so that was the end of a very fleeting relationship.

Anyway I'm starting to get the impression that when it comes to a spouse dead in Vietnam can sometimes mean divorced and the husbands can well and truly be alive and in their minds still claim ownership over their ex wives (especially if their is a continuing financial benefit).

Can anyone verify this or have had a similar experience ? thanks

dbrutter

My wife's late husband really is dead. I've been to his gravesite with her and his daughter and they have an altar set up for him in the house.  He died on his motorbike 10 years before we met and left her with a young daughter... so not all of the 'dead husbands' are scams. I'm sorry yours was.

Guestposter822

dbrutter wrote:

My wife's late husband really is dead. I've been to his gravesite with her and his daughter and they have an altar set up for him in the house.  He died on his motorbike 10 years before we met and left her with a young daughter... so not all of the 'dead husbands' are scams. I'm sorry yours was.


its wasn't a scam as the lady was genuine, it was just her interpretation of divorce (ie he's dead to me !)...

WillyBaldy

So the moral of the story is, if a lady ever tells you her husband is dead, ask her to bring you to his grave.  :lol:

Guestposter822

panda7 wrote:
dbrutter wrote:

My wife's late husband really is dead. I've been to his gravesite with her and his daughter and they have an altar set up for him in the house.  He died on his motorbike 10 years before we met and left her with a young daughter... so not all of the 'dead husbands' are scams. I'm sorry yours was.


its wasn't a scam as the lady was genuine, it was just her interpretation of divorce (ie he's dead to me !)...


I struggle with...how did he know you were seeing her, she must have told him and gave him your number.
Sounds like a woman to stay away from.

Ciambella

Personally, I've never heard a Vietnamese woman describing her estranged husband as dead.  Many adjectives are used, but never "dead".

Guestposter822

Ciambella wrote:

Personally, I've never heard a Vietnamese woman describing her estranged husband as dead.  Many adjectives are used, but never "dead".


I think it’s something they say to men they are interested in...and instead of saying they’re divorced they just say hubby is dead !

Guestposter822

Ciambella wrote:

Personally, I've never heard a Vietnamese woman describing her estranged husband as dead.  Many adjectives are used, but never "dead".


I dated a girl in Saigon, she asked me to go with her to her home town. Once we got there she asked if I wanted to go and see her husband, I said not really. She then told me it's okay, he is dead. She wanted to go put flowers on his grave with me in tow.

Contem talk

colinoscapee wrote:
Ciambella wrote:

Personally, I've never heard a Vietnamese woman describing her estranged husband as dead.  Many adjectives are used, but never "dead".


I dated a girl in Saigon, she asked me to go with her to her home town. Once we got there she asked if I wanted to go and see her husband, I said not really. She then told me it's okay, he is dead. She wanted to go put flowers on his grave with me in tow.


That sounds a bit scared.

vndreamer

One way to avoid dead husbands is to be selfish like me, date only single women that are not widows, divorced and even if never married, no children.  I know, easier said than done, but can be done.  I got lucky, I know.

Jim-Minh

It's hard to compete with a con ma. I think vndreamer has got a good idea.

markgor

yes... my wife conveniently forgot to tell me she had previously been married...

WillyBaldy

Better to find out she's only been married once compared to finding out she's got four kids out of three marriages!  :lol:

Articles to help you in your expat project in Vietnam

  • Dating In Vietnam
    Dating In Vietnam

    If you're considering moving to Hanoi, or Ho Chi Minh City, the dating scene may be of interest to you. ...

  • Making phone calls in Vietnam
    Making phone calls in Vietnam

    The telecommunications sector in Vietnam has flourished throughout the past two decades. Like many foreigners, ...

  • Moving to Vietnam with your pet
    Moving to Vietnam with your pet

    If you are planning to move to Vietnam with a pet, there are a number of formalities that have to be completed ...

  • Getting married in Vietnam
    Getting married in Vietnam

    Have you met that perfect someone who you want to spend the rest of your life with? Luckily, getting married in ...

  • Driving in Vietnam
    Driving in Vietnam

    Vietnam is known for four categories of lush and diverse landscapes, and one of the easiest ways to see firsthand ...

  • The most popular neighbourhoods in Hanoi
    The most popular neighbourhoods in Hanoi

    Formerly known as Thang Long, Vietnam's present capital city was renamed Hanoi in 1831. This enchanting, ...

  • Sports activities in Hanoi
    Sports activities in Hanoi

    We know there's a lot of attention on the drinking culture in Hanoi, but what about the options for a healthy ...

  • Working in Vietnam
    Working in Vietnam

    Anyone thinking about working in Vietnam is in for a treat. Compared to many Western countries, Vietnam's ...

All of Vietnam's guide articles