My Expat life as 'Mister' in Indonesia....

Every foreigner male in Indonesia is called 'Mister', blue eyed or brown eyed, blond on no blond, must look foreigner have white skin,  long nose,, tall and visible on spot  (lol)….The first time I heard the word outside the airport when a Taxi driver approached me and said 'Mister' taxi ! He laughed when I said No, I don't need a taxi. I thought, he didn't understand and still followed me. My girl friend besides, told me, just don't say anything and keep going. We went to a shuttle bus stand, bought a ticket to our town about 60km. The fare was quite cheap IDR50,000. Looking from the window, I was surprised to see a hell of motor bikes on the road. Wow, that many motor bikes !  I asked my GF and She smiled saying, you will see more when we enter into our town.  Since, I hadn't reserve any hotel room, We went to a 3 star hotel to get a room and to my surprise the counter clerk was not able to speak english, called the Manager. At this point I knew, I will have communication problem here. In few days we were married and planning to settle down, the first thing, the accommodation. If I had to go with my wife to see the house, the owner will ask more rent when see me as foreigner (Mister). We chose a housing compound and let my wife to negotiate the rent alone with the owner first then we went and saw. We got it on a fairly good price for a one year contract. I was back and forth couple of times from Canada until finally came to settle down. Now, we had to think of earning and living, How? To know that foreigners on family visa are not allowed to work or do any business, was really shocking to me. But we found a way, opened a Company in my wife's name and later opened few Internet Café. Though rent was high, It was easy and cheap to find employees though, and we started. Quality, privacy and standard was always in my mind when setting up the cafe, but it was a waste of money, I realized later. In few months I got famous and every one calling me 'Mister' even those who know my name still calling me Mr. except few relatives of my wife called me 'om' uncle. People I met in town, mostly the school teachers and my wife Alumni friends, some of them holding masters from University, communication was still a problem with them. Some time, I feel it awkward for everything to ask my wife to say in Indonesian language. I was kind of lazy to learn the language and my wife wanted to improve her english. She won and I'm still struggling. To buy stuff from local shops, if the price is not fixed I have to send my wife alone and myself wait in car. If they see me 'Mister' the price will be higher for me…(lol)…If you are ready to pay the Tip, dealing with officials, life is easy though we as Canadian not used to this kind of practice. I will not argue the rationale of 'TIP' you may call it a bribe, but the average salary for most regular employees ranges from $200-$300/month in Indonesia. Pretty low. They deserve it. Life is easy if you are ready to pay the TIP. Some time, you need a connection to get things done quickly. I got my SIM (Driving license) for motor bike and vehicle in just an hour in that office, got connection and paid the TIP. On the road it's some time annoying, you need a lot of patience and tolerance, especially the 'motors' motor bikes. They never follow any rules but their own, I call them, the desperate ones. No such things like 'right of way' is observed. The 'Angkot' the local passengers transport vehicles, drivers are so stupid some time. Don't mess with them, kind of crazy and frustrated they are. To act naive, I found a different way to deal with them, just wave my hand and smile, the trick worked for me most of the time. Apart from, on the road attitude, Indonesian peoples are generally very friendly and respectful. Expats earned a lot of respect. I was once invited by a friend to his private tutoring/courses school, I had to shake hand with about 50 students one by one who kissed my hand or touched with their forehead. A normal practice for a respect to elders. Indonesian people are family-oriented and do care their elders and respect them. The local skilled professional, with an exception of those working for a large organization, are fairly cheap to hire but must watch them, some time, lacking to apply common sense approach.  Most adult youths are not eager to learn new things or enhance their skill, just thinking to make some money a day. I had the experience of hiring and firing a few. One of our employee mishandled and broke our Photocopier which cost us huge money. We got our own house now built by some local skilled guys, they were really hard working ppl but again lacking common sense approach, working the old ways, the longer way that they like and keep on, and never ask question when in doubt. I had to see each and every job they did every day for four months, created doubts and let them think differently. Asked them, pushed them into the right way and get things done, tremendous job.  Must mention here, the relatives of my wife lend us some money as help as we ran out of cash at one stage for building that house. My mother in law lend us all her life savings, and told us, we can return whey have the money. That was great gesture, I admire. Things that I don't like here, privacy of people are not observed. They don't value time, will never be on time, always have lame excuses. Be careful dealing financial matters here, a lot of scams and hard to get your money back, some time impossible. We booked an apartment in Meikarta, it's been 3 years now, still this and that for getting our 12 Juta back. They lost our documents many times, such a hassle to deal with them, I regret. My wife lost 16 Juta (million) to a scam travel agency 'First Travel' paid for going to Umrah.

'Pasar Malam' the nightly market here in our town, selling stuff on amazingly low prices as compared to big stores and plazas. Don't have overhead expenses, just pay IDR 20000 for a stall for a night. My wife opened an imported vintage women clothes stall and earned good amount of money. But was a hassle everyday bringing and taking back the items in my SUV, had to remove seats, caused my car interior few scratches. Raining was another problem too. So we stopped going there after a while.

I'm Trying to adopt the Indonesian way, to talk like them, to act like them and do respect their culture, Life will be easy. For some it may be hard but that’s the way to go. Never compromise your fundamental values which is your identity.
                               
"Life is good when you get a good spouse"