Feeling Blue in France

Welcome on board Cynthia!

Where in Paris are you living? What is your occupation? Any hobby?

I move the discussion to the Paris forum

All the best,

Julien

I live in the 15th arrondissement but I go to school in St-Denis with the hellish line 13.  I am a master's student but I'm not too sure if the university is open or not.  Finally, I like to take pictures and take care of my doggy

I'm good for a cup of coffee. 

Ah, I can totally relate to the Paris blues you're feeling. Hope things will be better for you; usually a holiday helps!
Bon courage.

Lol I spend a lot of time outside of Paris and outside of France and it still does not help   I guess all I have to do is wait until I move elsewhere

Hy Cynthia, why are you feeling lonely?  Don't you have friends from school?
I want to move to Paris next year and this is one of the things that frighten me the most, loneliness.
I am much older than you are so I wonder if it would be harder for a woman my age (50) to not feel lonely in the city.
I hope you'll be better.
Syl

Project Paris 2010

Hello Cynthia,

I'm new to this forum. I'm also from Mtl, and I've been living in Lyon for over 2 years now. If you come this way, let's get together to get in touch with our common roots... sometimes it helps.

Berg

Hi Cynthia,

There is a Canadian meetup once in a while at the Frog bar (near Trocadero). There was one last week but I could not go. Last time that I went there were about 20 people and it was fun.

Sent me a message if you are interested in these kind of things.

I have been here 5 months now and the isolation is just starting to set in. Have been very homesick lately.

If you ever feel like a coffee and a chat drop me a message.

Hello Cynthia, hello Tehanu, hello everyone !!
So, I cheat a little bit: I am French and I am not an expat anymore. But I know how it is. I just come back from New York where I spent 3 wonderful years. I really like to meet new friends, so if you want to meet for a cup of tea, I would be very happy :-)  take care!!!

Hi Cynthia,
I think it's normal to feel like that at first in Paris. THe best thing to do is to really get involved in what's going on. Join expat meet up groups, check out listings sites in English  and then go to events etc and try to meet like minded people...
Hope this helps!
Kim x

Hello,

How come you are feeling bleu, you know what, i Have never felt bleu although never met any candian for since i came to Paris, and still so far, but glad to find just this forum to exchange ideas and just to not feel alone as you have montioned. anyway I think in your return you should be alright.
TK care

Hi Cynthia,
I also had the same feeling in Netherlands, where I spent 2years for professionnal reasons, and worst I didn't speak dutch at all. I'll also be glad to speak french with you around a coffee ;-)
Take care
Seb

If you move to a new culture and don't fall straight into a work-based community, integration can be really tough.  Isolation through language and through knowing no-one, that terrible catch-22: until you can speak the language, you can't make friends, until you make friends, you don't get chance to practice speaking the language.

Once feeling isolated, it's easy to then become disenfranchised: the quirks of the new culture suddenly cease to be quirky or amusing, instead, they become stupid, silly, annoying.  This is the slippery road into the worst of ex-patriotism: the 'them and us' attitude.

Break that cycle as early as you can.  Hard work, but do it.  Go out, learn the cultures, learn the people.  Regard a successful night out not as one where you had a good time with lots of new friends, but one where you saw local life in action and didn't appear too boring yourself. 

There are tricks to help, many just common-sense, but you have to re-define your goals for socialising, at least for the first year.

And the moment you feel you are over any hurdle, stop pushing the river, just let that one flow for a while.  Nothing works like a relaxed attitude

Louise x

Hi Cynthia,

I don't live in Paris, but I remember the feeling very well...

Like everyone else has said, getting involved with other expats is an easy first step towards feeling a little better.

They will understand what you're going through right now.

Also other French locals that have lived overseas are a great way to learn about where you are living.  They usually are involved with expat groups so they can stay up to date on their English.

Paris is a very different world than the rest of France, so I don't know if it's the same here in Alsace as it is there (and I doubt it is!)but joining a local French club is another good way to meet people.

Where I live they have a club for everything from running, tennis, and singing to charity, hiking, and shooting.

Regardless of what you choose to do, just remember that this feeling is temporary.  It will go away.  At some point you will feel more at home.

Another idea that might help you is here...
http://www.thought-detective.com/how-to … rsity.html

I have found it very helpful especially during the first year.

Take care of yourself,
Suzele