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GIRLFRIEND / FIANCE/ WIFE (??) FROM COLOMBIA

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ChineduOpara

@nico peligro I'd like to believe that these gringos who are going for the type of woman you described (let's rate those women "8.5 - 10") already know that these women are NOT relationship material. I mean, if they think even for a moment that THAT type of woman is anything more than a temporary plaything who enjoys their money, then they are truly delusional.


I think sane men keep their expectations realistic and grounded.


My version of realistic expectations: moderately attractive (6.5 - 8) woman between 30 and 45 (so, within 10 years of me, more or less), has a job/income, exercises (in some way shape or form), is literate, and believes in loyalty and monogamy (1 man + 1 woman, making things work through ups down downs).


It just so happens that the vast majority of single women in Colombia - even the "good" women - don't believe in monogamy and loyalty. Of course they ALWAYS blame their men, who are the same. However, when given a chance to be in a safe, loyal, monogamous relationship... they still reject that life, in favor of having  long list of multiple partners (some giving them money, some just for fun). So it's pretty big CULTURAL difference, that all foreigners need to be aware of.

nico peligro

@ChineduOpara

maybe ho for 5s or 6s

ChineduOpara

@nico peligro Well, I can't lie and say I've not had a 5 or 6 in Colombia... hard times hit us normal dudes 😅 but that's not the norm... I usually just "wait" and spend more $$ on a 7.5 - 8.5. I'm middle-aged so fortunately my libido is only high when I'm actually WITH someone, so I don't go around chasing tail like the younger dudes. Got too many other tasks, projects, hobbies, and distractions keeping me busy...

El Jer

@Chin I'm curious to hear your thinking on wifing-up in the old country and importing a spouse to Colombia. At least the climate and landscape of Bquilla wouldn't be too different from coastal Nigeria? Other than that too much of a shock to put somebody through with the language and absence of friends and family I surmise.

ChineduOpara

@El Jer Are you asking ME if I plan to find a wife from Nigeria and bring her to Colombia? Bruh... LOOOLOLOL!! After 20+ years of self-improvement, traveling, and searching (in multiple ways, in 3 different countries)... Mathematics, Statistics, and the Universe have made it CRYSTAL CLEAR that no moderately-attractive human woman on Earth wants me, and they NEVER will 🤣 And I'm too stubborn/idealistic/budget-minded to "Lead with my money" - because I want a genuine partner who actually likes me as a person, not someone who's with me for my funds and who will disappear or cheat if we hit Hard Times.


But if THAT wasn't your question... pls clarify so I can give a better answer 😏

El Jer

I was asking more about your thoughts on the prospects of doing that rather than if you had concrete plans. I thought there might have been a molecule of hope in connecting with someone from your birth culture whereas there seems to be zero molecules in regard to your adopted culture. I'm in the same boat, I've reconciled with it and I'm good.

ChineduOpara

@El Jer Oh, gotcha! Well, I don't have any hope, and I'm on the cusp of accepting it completely... almost there with you. Living in Colombia just means that, with my humble nest egg of savings and investment, I can actually afford comfortable accommodations and end-of-life healthcare.

nico peligro

@ChineduOpara you are middle aged , I am 68 no kids.

It is what it is. Too.many people in the world now a days, and so many too irresponsable, selfsh, mentally un balanced parents of both sexes.


Accept the blessings we have.


It is what it is and aint what it aint.


I saw your tirades ( excuse the word) were deleted on the other site. as well as my comments to thst guy  who was thinking of importing the Colombiana to the US he was in a long distance relation.


Maybe the op thought they were too " sexist".


Even though the fellow was open to getting " educated"


He somehow thought having a prenuptual would free him from his ten year financial support requirements stipulated by homeland security and immigration.


Poor guy. Hope he comes to his senses and doesnt import her.

nico peligro

@ChineduOpara dont know if you are following the discussions on EPS on the other forum   but cheap good healthcare in Colombis is almost over.


EPS is garbage now espescially since Petro is screwing with it and in 20 or 30 years any private healthcare costs will go through the roof.I pay 1.1 million for Medicina Prepagada now st 68.


Also a plethora of prerequisires and stipulations, copagos and things they dont cover.


As Milton Friedman said " there is no free lunch"


It is what it is.


And it aint what it.aint

ChineduOpara

@nico peligro I didn't even know my responses were deleted. Well, no matter, maybe the OP read them before they were deleted, and gave it more thought. If he decides to import her anyway... well, some people need to learn the hard way, you know?

ChineduOpara


    @ChineduOpara dont know if you are following the discussions on EPS on the other forum   but cheap good healthcare in Colombis is almost over.EPS is garbage now espescially since Petro is screwing with it and in 20 or 30 years any private healthcare costs will go through the roof.I pay 1.1 million for Medicina Prepagada now st 68.Also a plethora of prerequisires and stipulations, copagos and things they dont cover.As Milton Friedman said " there is no free lunch"It is what it is.And it aint what it.aint        -@nico peligro


You're paying 1.1 million a month or a year?

I really am worried about any upcoming changes to the healthcare system, especially if the prices for SURA go up drastically. I fear that within 5 years Colombia will be unaffordable for us old folks who aren't part of the Rat Race anymore...

nico peligro

@ChineduOpara a Month of course.

And you hit 75 it goes up more, and SURA prepagada is even more expensive than what I have ( quoted directly from the lady whose name you gave me).


Also SURA EPS is shutting down operstions  in Colombia .


And who knows what.will happen with the private services. The law stipuates you have to be on EPS to be on Medicina Prepagada, but thats another law that is not currently enforced.


And I have been affiliated for 11 years. IF i wanted to join now they wouldnt take me because of age.


And they dont cover prescriptions until after hospitilization.


And all types of copagos.


And these fly by night operations you and I are registerd in to get our visas only cover emergency service, and even then   good luck collecting.


As far as EPS  the gravy train.is over. Even before Petro , the previous government was trying to.prevent foriegners from gettng cheap access to the health care system  as it was abused a lot. Thats why they changed the visa process in 2022  saying new pensionado visa applicants are ineligible to enroll in EPS, make us get these crappy health packages that supposedly include repatriation to our " home" country in case we really get sick and become  a " burden" on thier system, and are occaisionally ( though rarely) trying to enforce the.rule that you pay 5% of your monthly overseas income to EPS ( this is actually the law  but is rarely enforced, but the Cancilleria did try to push it on.me in a previous visa application)


Basically, when.you get old  you cant rely on any health care system, anywhere, private and even less public. You have to  take care of yourself.


As MF said " there is no free lunch"

crespobrenda

Ugh! doesnt sound promising  does anyone use their heAlthcare from the states? such as medicare primary and blue cross blue shield secondsary?  or is that a dream I’m  having?!

ChineduOpara

@nico peligro Damn. This is good to know, because my plan WAS to retire in Colombia. Right now i am doing OK with my SURA prepagada... but I'll have to take these changes into consideration as I plan my future here.


I might have to look more closely at retiring in Paraguay...

Lpdiver

@crespobrenda You can't use them in Colombia.


regards,


elp

cccmedia


my plan WAS to retire in Colombia. Right now i am doing OK with my SURA prepagada... but I'll have to take these changes into consideration as I plan my future here.I might have to look more closely at retiring in Paraguay...        -@ChineduOpara

.

.

.

Paraguay has low cost of living .. and reports on Expat sites

indicate it is still relatively easy to obtain a visa, although

that may be changing. 


Problems...

(1) Not easy to get there from points to the North.  Some

connections make the airport-to-airport time more than

15 hours.  Virtually no direct flights from Colombia and

Ecuador.


(2) The heat can be oppressive.  Visit first before deciding.


Caleb Jones, who has several YouTube websites and lives

in UAE and Paraguay, has posted extensively about

Paraguay on his five-flags and unchained CEO channels.


cccmedia

ChineduOpara


    my plan WAS to retire in Colombia. Right now i am doing OK with my SURA prepagada... but I'll have to take these changes into consideration as I plan my future here.I might have to look more closely at retiring in Paraguay...        -@ChineduOpara...Paraguay has low cost of living .. and reports on Expat sitesindicate it is still relatively easy to obtain a visa, althoughthat may be changing.  Problems...(1) Not easy to get there from points to the North.  Someconnections make the airport-to-airport time more than 15 hours.  Virtually no direct flights from Colombia andEcuador.(2) The heat can be oppressive.  Visit first before deciding.Caleb Jones, who has several YouTube websites and livesin UAE and Paraguay, has posted extensively aboutParaguay on his five-flags and unchained CEO channels.cccmedia        -@cccmedia


According to the Paraguay website and the migration folks there, one can get Temporary Residency pretty easily, and then later convert it to Permanent Residency. However, they do need one's Birth Certificate to be legalized in a specific way, and my Nigerian birth certificate is a problem cuz it can't be legalized in the way they want. Once again, my country of origin (in which I had zero choice) is a cross/curse that makes my life so much more difficult, or straight-up blocks me from certain things/places. Oh well! 🤷🏾‍♂️


Yeah I saw that it's not an easy/quick flight between here and Paraguay... that was one of the reasons I decided on the "easy way out" (4 days in Miami). As far as the heat goes... I actually like warm weather, and I can deal with "a little too hot" weather... I might be uncomfortable, but a shower and a good fan (not A/C, but a fan) keeps me happy. Cold weather, on the other hand, gives me serious chills... I can literally fall sick after 1 hour of exposure to cold. Side note: if I NEVER have to shovel Philadelphia snow again, it'll still be Too Soon 😅


Regarding your very good point... yes I really should have used my "tourist stamp reset" trip to visit Paraguay instead of wasting time in Miami. I could have spent the same amount of money and killed 2 birds with 1 stone: explored Asunción for a few weeks, spoken with a migración staff person face-to-face, and gotten another country stamp on my passport. Oh well, hindsight is 20/20!


I should probably still investigate Paraguay in-person, maybe there's a way around the Birth Certificate Legalization issue. At least give it a shot before other Digital Nomads start flocking there en-masse and Paraguay tightens their immigration rules the way Colombia just did!

nico peligro

@ChineduOpara Paraguay is last place I.would consider moving to..


Like moving to Mehta or Low part of Tolima

ChineduOpara


    @ChineduOpara Paraguay is last place I.would consider moving to..
Like moving to Mehta or Low part of Tolima
   

    -@nico peligro


Dang, that's discouraging. How long did you stay in Paraguay, and what was your experience? (Maybe we should continue chatting privately, or in the Paraguay forum, if this website has that)

nico peligro

No, was never there, justcread books and  articles ablut it.


A hot, humid climate in flatm terrain far from.mountains or ocean.is not for me.

ChineduOpara

@nico peligro Gotcha 💯 and I agree. "There is no 1-size fits all" country, afterall...

where2go


My advice to anyone on the forum as soon as they ask you for money run.  Make it very very clear upfront there will be no giving of money at all.  If they stick around then they truly care about you it is a no brainer.  You need to frame this as you don't want to feel like you are buying love.
My ex-girlfriend was a professional con-artist at its finest.  There are even times still looking back that I believe she did love and care about me because some of the things I just don't see how they could be faked.  The reality is I don't care if she did or didn't because I hit a point I just didn't want to be in a relationship where I was shelling out thousands of dollars and living worlds apart.
Western Union got to see some good business from me for a couple of months.  smile.png-@decadude

Back on this. Would you guys say that this advice is pretty much the same in all of Latin America, Phillipines etc? These girls are money hungry. But is it just a different culture? Apparently even in Russia the mans job is to pay for the woman, in all situations regardless of if the woman works or not.  I've known a Brazilian woman for some years now, she never asked for money but recently she has. It just seems to be, if you are going to call it a relationship, or even just sex, they want money and thats the way it is in these places?

ChineduOpara


    My advice to anyone on the forum as soon as they ask you for money run.  Make it very very clear upfront there will be no giving of money at all.  If they stick around then they truly care about you it is a no brainer.  You need to frame this as you don't want to feel like you are buying love.My ex-girlfriend was a professional con-artist at its finest.  There are even times still looking back that I believe she did love and care about me because some of the things I just don't see how they could be faked.  The reality is I don't care if she did or didn't because I hit a point I just didn't want to be in a relationship where I was shelling out thousands of dollars and living worlds apart.Western Union got to see some good business from me for a couple of months.  smile.png-@decadudeBack on this. Would you guys say that this advice is pretty much the same in all of Latin America, Phillipines etc? These girls are money hungry. But is it just a different culture? Apparently even in Russia the mans job is to pay for the woman, in all situations regardless of if the woman works or not.  I've known a Brazilian woman for some years now, she never asked for money but recently she has. It just seems to be, if you are going to call it a relationship, or even just sex, they want money and thats the way it is in these places?        -@where2go


-@decadude I have my own similar fake ex-girlfriend story to tell, but I'll save that for my journal 😅


-@where2go I would say that it's the same in the entire world (well, let's say 99% of women, with the 1% being reserved for the rare exceptions). That is to say, women are simply instinctively programmed (by millions of years of primate evolution) and socially conditioned to be "taken care of in exchange for sex and the chance of procreation with her, an attractive female".


What the heck does this mean? This means that, if she is in a sexual relationship with a man, EVEN if she herself is financially stable and doesn't lack for her needs and even some luxuries... she will STILL expect him to pay for stuff (and also provide some "security", whatever that means to her). This brings to mind a phrase that's so popular among women in North America: "What's mine is mine, what's yours is also mine" 😏


If that's the case with women who have jobs and don't lack for anything, can you IMAGINE how it is with women who are poor and probably lack some Basic Human Needs? Logically, it's the most natural thing in the world for them to barter a Basic Human Need (sex) for other Basic Human Needs (food, shelter, clothing... all of which can be bought with money). This has been going on for thousands of years, and this is why sex work is called the World's Oldest Profession 🤷🏾‍♀️


Long story short: Almost always (not always, but ALMOST always), it boils down to transactions... whether it's long-term (marriage) or short-term (1 hour in a motel)... it boils down to the same thing 💱


On a side-note, this is why I am a strong supporter of decriminalization of sex work globally. Since the vast majority of people (both men and women) see sex as transactional, then that path should be formalized, legalized, taxed, and regulated just like any other industry. That way, a percentage of people (again, both men and women) can set aside feelings, moralization, and expectations... and just be more honest/clear about their intentions (lack of one or more Basic Human Need). As is the case in Germany, The Netherlands, Colombia, etc. With this system, Free Market Capitalism wins, basic Human Needs wins... it's a win-win as far as I am concerned. Not to mention... the revenue windfall that it would bring to some poorer nations 🤑



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