Starting my life in the Philippines

Regardless, I would take it slow. I would meet her and see if there is a connection but have your own physical space while here.  Also plan on visiting multiple places to see which one you like the most; Manila, Baguio, Cebu and maybe Davao. Good luck

Hello my name is Stefan Rivera Sanchez and I would like to tell you about the woman that I met online I think the website was called Cupid I wasn't interested in her at first because a lot of other women had caught my eye and I had over 10 women coming at me you know saying hello to me asking me questions but I kept going back to her page I started liking her a lot next thing I knew we are in touch with each other she told me she was married after a couple days we were talking over the phone but she said they were separated and she said he was a chef I am an aviation mechanic and I want to start a business in the Philippines but I feel that she should have told me her plans on getting annulment or trying to do something so we can get married I need some good advice she tells me that she loves me I don't know if she's lying or not but she says it so many times and do you think I should confront her about that or just let it go for now cuz we just started talking I'm planning on coming to the Philippines on February 3rd
-@Stephensanchez157

Welcome to the forum Stefan. A still married woman? Annulment could take years and guess who will be paying for that? 100 to 500K pesos and much heart ache along the way.

If the husband is still around? Push away with a barge pole and learn to start again.

OMO.

Cheers, Steve.

Annulments in the Philippines are scams ... everyone is in on it ... Lawyers, Judges,Clerks, etc. That said, run like hell ... you don't need that baggage... Not judging, just saying.

Good Grief . . . .Another ATM is Philippine bound.

You will probably find out that she already has a couple of kids also.

`

Dear Mr Stefan Rivera Sanchez

Do yourself a favour, listen well to the wise gentlemen-expats

`

@Enzyte Bob

Yes I'd say we get about one a month on this site - must be a full moon. Just to be clear to the OP: you meet a girl online who after 2 days says she loves you. Would you say that to a girl online after 2 days?

@Stephensanchez157 Stefan - (1) You're being given a lot of good advice here, listen to what everyone is saying, it will help you avoid a lot of unnecessary headaches  (2) Just go there, plenty of beautiful, unmarried women will be interested in you, no need to get into the mess that being with a married woman can bring and (3) If this isn't a troll post, then the best advice I can give you is not to get caught up in false feelings from a long distance relationship, regardless of how many video calls you do. It's simply not the same as being with someone in person.

Good luck to you!

Make sure to send her plenty of money to help with annulment cost....just kidding of course

@Stephensanchez157 Stephan... Brother believe me please... the other guys are right... annulment in Philippines is VERY expensive and takes a VERY long time... 2) She probably has children, and 3) the husband is probably still in the picture much more than you know... possibly even still together. There are MANY scammers on Cupid that say those exact things... many times the husband is in on it... you come, they sweet talk you... Love, love,love... before you know it, you are sending monthly "allowance" $$$... which supports them all... and you are heading down a very tough path. My suggestion is this... Come... and don't tell her you are... get a hotel or rent a condo or whatever... surprise her(if you can find where she lives)... you will find out quickly if she is "real" or not(listen to your gut) ... and 2... the other guys are tight... Philippines is not like anywhere else... all you have to do is go to a mall, or stop at sari sari stores, or rent a moped and go up into the mountain and stop and chat at little eateries... there are are seriously beautiful woman here, and really truly amazing woman who will treat you like a freeking king every single day... AND THEY WILL WANT TO BE WITH YOU... (Forigners are kike rock stars here) I have been with one for 3 years now...  shes from a small mountain community up above a small town called ipil on Mindanao... But when I started this chapter in my life... I also found one on  like yours on cupid.... roughly 700,000p later, and 3 trips over found out she was with a pinoy when I was in the states.... she was also from a large area like cebu.

Many poor, or desperate woman will daily sit in their phones here, and "fish" for foreigners to support them... and the first warning sign is they fall in "love" with you very quickly... now don't get me wrong... even my little mountain angel that I have been with also did (fell in love with me) (filipinas do) 3 years ago... but super different... no kids for one... my first "experience " did have 1 child... anyways... take care... GO SLOW..

MANY, MANY, MANY woman here would love to be with you... easy, easy , easy... just GO SLOW... and Keep your wallet in you pocket. Dont be an atm machine.... Your gal may start having "problems" soon and need "help" ... and her saying "I Love You" without face to face time is a major red flag...  Take Care Bro...

@Stephensanchez157 Stefan - (1) You're being given a lot of good advice here, listen to what everyone is saying, it will help you avoid a lot of unnecessary headaches (2) Just go there, plenty of beautiful, unmarried women will be interested in you, no need to get into the mess that being with a married woman can bring. Good luck to you! -@Parvaze

`

This is simply the truth, Stephen. Have a look at the young students below.

Now, I'm NOT suggesting you try getting serious with school children. However, the photo clearly demonstrates there are very many very attractive young ladies whom soon are, or will be, looking for partners.

Why allow yourself to fall for an already married women? That's a decision that you, her and her husband will likely forever regret, no matter now how often she says, "I love you." Pick another single gal around about your age matey!

`   

Let me tell you a true story, happened to me and is similar to your predicament. I met a woman on Facebook from the Philippines, my second relationship with a filipino. She was beautiful and came from Davao, had three sisters, one of whom had already met a French man and moved over to France. She and the two other sisters stayed in a condo with three cousins and her sisters boyfriend and their newly born daughter.

We chatted on Facebook for a few months just about every day and her Facebook profile said she was single so I never thought to question it. She never asked me for money although I did send her flowers and chocolates for valentines day or her birthday (Can't remember which). We just chatted about everyday things, our interests/hobbies, dreams, travel, food and our families, etc.

After four or five months we agreed I would visit so I booked my flights, Manchester to Seoul (Via Doha since I fancied a few days in Seoul. Then from Seoul to Manila, a quick change of terminals via the airport bus and then my onward flight to Davao. I had booked a room at the Apo View Hotel for two in Davao.

So I had booked the flights and hotel 6 to 8 weeks before travel and all was set for our meeting when suddenly she told me she had a boyfriend and she was not single. After chatting on Facebook for a few days the boyfriend turned into a husband, who was working abroad in Saudi I thinks at a Frankie and Bennies restaurant or TGI Friday's. Turns out she also had two daughters aged about 9 and 12 I think.

So by this time I had my flights booked (non refundable although the hotel I could cancel and get my cash back) but I decided to go ahead anyway.

Don't get me wrong, if I had know she was married before I had booked the flights I would have changed my mind and stayed home but I went anyway. Lovely woman, so beautiful and a really good personality. I did have a great time and she was very attentive to my needs although it did come at a price with her two sisters and cousins hanging in tow some of the time. I was lucky in that respect to some degree with one of her sisters having an Aussie boyfriend, we ended up splitting most of the bills between us when we were out for meals and such with the extended family. Their arrangement in the condo worked though apart from the lack of space. One sister had a job and after her work most nights attended college, my lady helped with the cooking and cleaning and the condo they had for free. Some American who rented it let them stay for free while he was back home for a year or so.

Like I said before even though I had a blast I would not have gone if I knew she was married and the end game would probably have been to get me to stump up the cash for the annulment then maybe she would have left me and moved on. We did still chat when I got back and I would have liked to remain friends but my old Facebook Account got hacked and she decided to change her name with Thai or Japanese characters so I could never find her again. One more thing about her was that she did ask for money when I got back home but never tried to scam me just plain and simple asked and gave the reason, help with rent when she moved out of the condo, help pay for food, etc. I said no but at least it was refreshing just to know why she was asking for money.

Looking back now I can honestly say I enjoyed my time with her very very much and Davao was the one city in the Philippines that I actually liked. Guess what guys and gals - her name was Cherry Ann, hence my user name. Never will be able to forget her even if she was married.

Your story chimes with how my neighbour here in Bath met his Filipina wife from Dumaguete. It was serendipity in that he had arranged to meet a girl in Mindanao (can't remember where) but they did not click. She had a cousin and they all visited Dumaguete. The cousin (hope you're following this ) had a friend who my neighbour really liked which turned out to be his future wife, a really lovely girl.

Often in life with the best laid plans that go belly up, bad events can metamorphose into something positive. This is especially true in the Philippines from my experience.

Cherryann01 said . . . .Let me tell you a true story, happened to me and is similar to your predicament. I met a woman on Facebook from the Philippines, my second relationship with a filipino

****************************************

(1) I'm getting confused by some of your experiences.

(2) At one time you said you had twin girls . . .Was that with the First Filipina? Second Filipina?

(3) Also you were here recently and left with a broken heart?

(4) Was it you who said you had 200 replies on Cupid.Hose.Job and you narrowed it down to 5 or 6 that you visited?

My advice to the OP. . . bring hats for both heads.

Cherryann01 said . . . .Let me tell you a true story, happened to me and is similar to your predicament. I met a woman on Facebook from the Philippines, my second relationship with a filipino
****************************************
(1) I'm getting confused by some of your experiences.

(2) At one time you said you had twin girls . . .Was that with the First Filipina? Second Filipina?

(3) Also you were here recently and left with a broken heart?

(4) Was it you who said you had 200 replies on Cupid.Hose.Job and you narrowed it down to 5 or 6 that you visited?

My advice to the OP. . . bring hats for both heads.
-@Enzyte Bob

No Bob it was not me who said I had twin girls. I have a nineteen year old daughter here in the UK from my previous marriage and a two year old daughter in the Philippines.

Not me leaving recently with a broken hear either or the guy who had 200 replies on the dating site although I do remember reading the post with lots of replies from the dating site.

I am the one with the G/F or Ex who said she lost a wad of cash in some LFC investment scheme.

Hope that clears things up for you.

This posting is so typical that it almost sound like a troll forum revival posting.

Even Quasimodo will get dozend of Filipina Cupid replies within a day if he starts chatting. Trust me, i'm almost looking like him, just my hump is on the belly side and not the back. I usually chatted with 5 woman in parallel windows at the beginning.

I think i found the perfect woman for me. BUT to find out, i chatted with her for 2 and a half years (because we just started at Covid) and only after 15 month we talked about i love you. And even this wasn't really true because it wasn't the feeling until i finally meet in real life.   You can't fall in love with a chat version, you imagine too much from yourself into the other person.

So come here in February and have fun. Hope it's not your first Asian visit or you will learn a few things the hard way. Everyone i know did that.

My recipe for finding a relation:

• Make sure every side is 100% honest (remember all details and verify)
• Don't date with the  "age" is just a number mentality because age different does matter.
• Don't be arrogant against the Filipino style of living that the persons can't change (like the famous BigEd TV personality)
• Make sure you can and do communicate a lot
• Understand and provide that she needs a perspective in life and old age, talk about how the future can be organized and financed. VERY IMPORTANT.
• Be a nice guy

I've seen so many foreigners breaking any single one of this points and you know what, they got what they deserved.

@Stephensanchez157 - the reason that securing a declaration of nullity of marriage is difficult is  that marriage is not simply treated as a children's game; the law protects marriage as being sacred! Being said that, why is this woman asking for an annulment in the first place?

Just not being in love, the court will not allow for marriages to be broken! People tends to be in love several times!

This protection is given to who ever get married in the Philippines whether you are a Filipino or a foreigner;

So choose wisely! there are a lot of good marriageable Filipina's  that you do not need to shell out at the very most USD10,000.00; you just need to put effort;

Visit the Philippines first and find the girl of your desire face to face and you might find her but pray that to love her will not be too expensive🙏

This maybe premature yet but welcome to the Philippines; Mabuhay!

@Cynthiavilla I think the reason many single expats try to connect with women online, myself included, who are thinking about moving to the Philippines is that it's quite daunting to potentially go somewhere where you don't know anyone, don't know the culture and don't know the ins/outs of being there. So we we end up trying to make a connection before arriving, but that's not a great idea based on my own experiences. Lord knows I've gone through literally hundreds of messages from various sites that almost always end up with some sort of scam, sob story or requests for money. I've come to the obvious conclusion that it's better to learn from the experience of other expats and just make a trip there. It might be a bit of a learning curve and some trial & error but it's the best way

Cherryann01 said . . . .Let me tell you a true story, happened to me and is similar to your predicament. I met a woman on Facebook from the Philippines, my second relationship with a filipino
****************************************
(1) I'm getting confused by some of your experiences.

(2) At one time you said you had twin girls . . .Was that with the First Filipina? Second Filipina?

(3) Also you were here recently and left with a broken heart?

(4) Was it you who said you had 200 replies on Cupid.Hose.Job and you narrowed it down to 5 or 6 that you visited?

My advice to the OP. . . bring hats for both heads.
-@Enzyte Bob

*************************************************************
No Bob it was not me who said I had twin girls. I have a nineteen year old daughter here in the UK from my previous marriage and a two year old daughter in the Philippines.

Not me leaving recently with a broken hear either or the guy who had 200 replies on the dating site although I do remember reading the post with lots of replies from the dating site.

I am the one with the G/F or Ex who said she lost a wad of cash in some LFC investment scheme.

Hope that clears things up for you.
-@Cherryann01

********************************************************************************

OK MY BAD . . . . . .

On the thread of: Pros and Cons of retiring in the Philippines (Nov 12th post #19) You said you had three previous relationships  in the Philippine before the current girl friend.

On the thread of: LFC Investment Scheme (Nov 11th post #9)  You said in May 2019 your daughter was conceived after a 5/6 month of chats with your current girlfriend.

@Parvaze Well said... agree 100% ... Easier to have a "connection" before arriving to a strange/foreign place... But best to stay completely single while doing so to keep options wide open.

@Wellsfry Yes, that's the conclusion I've come to. I don't mind having conversations online and even potentially meeting in person but certainly won't think of any of those women as gf. Will wait until I get there and meander around to see what the real story is 😁

@Parvaze hi you are right! but now you have this group; their experiences will give you food for thoughts!

Keep safe!

@Cynthiavilla

Ok off topic but I'm curious why you would want to leave a beautiful city like Vancouver to live in a dump like Quezon city. Has the highest murder/robbery rate in the NCP and probably the most depressing shopping mall I've ever visited namely the 'Ally Mall'.  Its only cultural asset is the Araneta Coliseum..

Not all places in the Philippines are bad; I have a place in a remote area in Cebu; Tagaytay, Quezon City and looking forward to own a place in Bohol;

@Lotus Eater hate winters!

@Lotus Eater hate winters!
-@Cynthiavilla

Me too. so so cold in England now, much rather be some place warmer.

@Cherryann01

Cherryann01 said . . . .Let me tell you a true story, happened to me and is similar to your predicament. I met a woman on Facebook from the Philippines, my second relationship with a filipino
****************************************
(1) I'm getting confused by some of your experiences.

(2) At one time you said you had twin girls . . .Was that with the First Filipina? Second Filipina?

(3) Also you were here recently and left with a broken heart?

(4) Was it you who said you had 200 replies on Cupid.Hose.Job and you narrowed it down to 5 or 6 that you visited?

My advice to the OP. . . bring hats for both heads.
-@Enzyte Bob
*************************************************************
No Bob it was not me who said I had twin girls. I have a nineteen year old daughter here in the UK from my previous marriage and a two year old daughter in the Philippines.

Not me leaving recently with a broken hear either or the guy who had 200 replies on the dating site although I do remember reading the post with lots of replies from the dating site.

I am the one with the G/F or Ex who said she lost a wad of cash in some LFC investment scheme.

Hope that clears things up for you.
-@Cherryann01********************************************************************************

OK MY BAD . . . . . .
On the thread of: Pros and Cons of retiring in the Philippines (Nov 12th post #19) You said you had three previous relationships in the Philippine before the current girl friend.

On the thread of: LFC Investment Scheme (Nov 11th post #9) You said in May 2019 your daughter was conceived after a 5/6 month of chats with your current girlfriend.
-@Enzyte Bob

That is correct, three previous relationships in the Philippines. Correct again about me chatting to my girlfriend or ex now for 5 or 6 months but I hate to say this Bob but sex education in the US must have been bad in the 50's if you were told a baby could be conceived online after a few months chatting on social media. Just joking, I then obviously went over there to meet the woman.

@Cherryann01
-@Cynthiavilla

It is currently about -3 here and the highest temperature expected later is -1 and it is foggy and trying to snow.

@Wellsfry Yes, that's the conclusion I've come to. I don't mind having conversations online and even potentially meeting in person but certainly won't think of any of those women as gf. Will wait until I get there and meander around to see what the real story is 😁
-@Parvaze

Whilst I totally agree with what you are saying, I do think that it is easier said than done. I imagine you get a lot of women trying to scam you but also the genuine ladies on these sites looking for a proper loving relationship want some sort of emotional commitment before you actually meet them especially if we are talking about chatting to them for an extended period of time.

Also, call me old fashioned if you want, but I would not really be wanting to line then up to meet before I go. I think it is still wrong and slightly deceitful to arrange to meet 5 or 6 women in one visit unless you are clear to these ladies that is what you are doing. Also if you take the plunge and go to the Philippines to try find that special lady, do you travel around or just pick a place and spend the whole time there?

Cherryann01 said . . . .Let me tell you a true story, happened to me and is similar to your predicament. I met a woman on Facebook from the Philippines, my second relationship with a filipino
****************************************
(1) I'm getting confused by some of your experiences.

(2) At one time you said you had twin girls . . .Was that with the First Filipina? Second Filipina?

(3) Also you were here recently and left with a broken heart?

(4) Was it you who said you had 200 replies on Cupid.Hose.Job and you narrowed it down to 5 or 6 that you visited?

My advice to the OP. . . bring hats for both heads.
-@Enzyte Bob
*************************************************************
No Bob it was not me who said I had twin girls. I have a nineteen year old daughter here in the UK from my previous marriage and a two year old daughter in the Philippines.

Not me leaving recently with a broken hear either or the guy who had 200 replies on the dating site although I do remember reading the post with lots of replies from the dating site.

I am the one with the G/F or Ex who said she lost a wad of cash in some LFC investment scheme.

Hope that clears things up for you.
-@Cherryann01

************************************************

OK MY BAD . . . . . .
On the thread of: Pros and Cons of retiring in the Philippines (Nov 12th post #19) You said you had three previous relationships in the Philippine before the current girl friend.

On the thread of: LFC Investment Scheme (Nov 11th post #9) You said in May 2019 your daughter was conceived after a 5/6 month of chats with your current girlfriend.

-@Enzyte Bob

******************************************************************

That is correct, three previous relationships in the Philippines. Correct again about me chatting to my girlfriend or ex now for 5 or 6 months but I hate to say this Bob but sex education in the US must have been bad in the 50's if you were told a baby could be conceived online after a few months chatting on social media. Just joking, I then obviously went over there to meet the woman.
-@Cherryann01

*******************************************************************

Maybe I explained that wrong . . . You chatted with her for 5 or 6 months, then you came here and your daughter was conceived on that visit.

Cherryann01 said . . . .Let me tell you a true story, happened to me and is similar to your predicament. I met a woman on Facebook from the Philippines, my second relationship with a filipino
****************************************
(1) I'm getting confused by some of your experiences.

(2) At one time you said you had twin girls . . .Was that with the First Filipina? Second Filipina?

(3) Also you were here recently and left with a broken heart?

(4) Was it you who said you had 200 replies on Cupid.Hose.Job and you narrowed it down to 5 or 6 that you visited?

My advice to the OP. . . bring hats for both heads.
-@Enzyte Bob
*************************************************************
No Bob it was not me who said I had twin girls. I have a nineteen year old daughter here in the UK from my previous marriage and a two year old daughter in the Philippines.

Not me leaving recently with a broken hear either or the guy who had 200 replies on the dating site although I do remember reading the post with lots of replies from the dating site.

I am the one with the G/F or Ex who said she lost a wad of cash in some LFC investment scheme.

Hope that clears things up for you.

-@Cherryann01

**********************************************************

OK MY BAD . . . . . .
On the thread of: Pros and Cons of retiring in the Philippines (Nov 12th post #19) You said you had three previous relationships in the Philippine before the current girl friend.

On the thread of: LFC Investment Scheme (Nov 11th post #9) You said in May 2019 your daughter was conceived after a 5/6 month of chats with your current girlfriend.

-@Enzyte Bob
********************************************************************************
That is correct, three previous relationships in the Philippines. Correct again about me chatting to my girlfriend or ex now for 5 or 6 months but I hate to say this Bob but sex education in the US must have been bad in the 50's if you were told a baby could be conceived online after a few months chatting on social media. Just joking, I then obviously went over there to meet the woman.
-@Cherryann01
*******************************************************************
Maybe I explained that wrong . . . You chatted with her for 5 or 6 months, then you came here and your daughter was conceived on that visit.
-@Enzyte Bob

@Enzyte Bob

That is correct 5 or 6 months chatting on Facebook then met her in Cagayan De Oro and stayed at the Apple Tree Resort. Also visited her and my daughter May this year.

@Lotus Eater hate winters!
-@Cynthiavilla

Yes Vancouver although blessed with a temperate climate can get chilly in the winter months and it never stops raining.

@Lotus Eater hate winters!
-@Cynthiavilla
Yes Vancouver although blessed with a temperate climate can get chilly in the winter months and it never stops raining.
-@Lotus Eater

Yeh but snow, rain and cold temperatures in Vancouver beat the crap out of the same in Bradford

@Enzyte Bob
That is correct 5 or 6 months chatting on Facebook then met her in Cagayan De Oro and stayed at the Apple Tree Resort. Also visited her and my daughter May this year.
-@Cherryann01

And if I recall correctly Cherryanne the Durex machine at the Apple Tree Resort had run out of rubbers hence your current predicament 🤣

@Cherryann01 I'd agree that is incredibly difficult not to get emotionally attached to someone you're chatting with online however, at least for me, I think it's better to keep a little distance until you actually meet.  I also appreciate your perspective but disagree that it's deceitful in any way to chat with multiple women online to try to get to know more about them and then meet in person to see if you have chemistry and/or if the person is who they represent themselves to be online. Now, I would totally agree that if you're chatting with, and lining up these women, just for short term "fun" then it's disingenuous.

@Enzyte Bob
That is correct 5 or 6 months chatting on Facebook then met her in Cagayan De Oro and stayed at the Apple Tree Resort. Also visited her and my daughter May this year.
-@Cherryann01
And if I recall correctly Cherryanne the Durex machine at the Apple Tree Resort had run out of rubbers hence your current predicament 🤣
-@Lotus Eater

No I did bring rubbers, just got caught up in the moment which has now turned into a life time responsibility haha.

@Cherryann01 I'd agree that is incredibly difficult not to get emotionally attached to someone you're chatting with online however, at least for me, I think it's better to keep a little distance until you actually meet. I also appreciate your perspective but disagree that it's deceitful in any way to chat with multiple women online to try to get to know more about them and then meet in person to see if you have chemistry and/or if the person is who they represent themselves to be online. Now, I would totally agree that if you're chatting with, and lining up these women, just for short term "fun" then it's disingenuous.
-@Parvaze

I agree with you but I meant more from the woman's side. My experience on Facebook as always been that most of the women who are not trying to scam you straight away seem to declare their love for you within 3 days at most, some within 30 minutes of chatting. I don't think the their frequent use of emojis, stickers and Gifs help either, it seems to start with a wink and before you know it after they send a couple of pictures of themselves and ask you to do the same, they are declaring their love for you.

So when we men do not respond to that it is finished. It is hard  to find a woman to just chat to and let things develop over the course of time or until you go there to meet her.