Toxic Neighbor

Hi,
he is in the wrong but he will think he lost face last night in front of his friends which is  a very serious issue to people in the Philippines. It can lead to all sorts of trouble in the future for you in the neighbourhood. 
Even though he was the idiot here the best thing to do is to try and calm it down and go and reason with him and perhaps take a peace offering. I doubt he will apologise as his pride will not allow him to do that  but it’s more important to try and defuse the situation.

Thanks Mike. Yes, it was pretty serious last night. It was like he had a temper tantrum. I am trying to defuse the situation today by avoiding contact and not taking it to the next level -- just letting him cool down. Lord willing, he will.

I don't think it would be right to offer any kind of peace offering because he is unreasonable, and we did nothing wrong in telling his visitor he could not park in front of our house.

I think he saved face when he came at me two or three times and his friends stopped him -- wouldn't you think? He has probably never had a neighbor stand up to him before. But, wow!

Nevertheless, I'm concerned about our safety and welfare here. So, my wife and I are already discussing moving.

Good idea to move. That's a bad situation. I won't live anywhere here but a gated community or one comprised of similar professionals - it's just not worth the risk and aggravation. I know others won't agree with me on that but life is too short to be constantly aggravated by noise, drunkenness and other common behaviors here. I won't put up with it in my home country either.

pnwcyclist wrote:

Good idea to move. That's a bad situation. I won't live anywhere here but a gated community or one comprised of similar professionals - it's just not worth the risk and aggravation. I know others won't agree with me on that but life is too short to be constantly aggravated by noise, drunkenness and other common behaviors here. I won't put up with it in my home country either.

Thanks! I'm just not sure where to move. Any suggestions? This is supposed to be a middle class subdivision, but the people act lower class.

I don't really know that area as I'm in the Visayas, but on my one trip up there to see Tagaytay a couple of years ago, I was impressed with several subdivisions in a newer part of Santa Rosa which looked very nice. I actually toured some modern tropical style homes that were for sale. Might be some in there for rent by now.

You really need a gated community with Security guards or even a condo in a really good development again with security plus off- secure parking.

pnwcyclist wrote:

I don't really know that area as I'm in the Visayas, but on my one trip up there to see Tagaytay a couple of years ago, I was impressed with several subdivisions in a newer part of Santa Rosa which looked very nice. I actually toured some modern tropical style homes that were for sale. Might be some in there for rent by now.

Thanks!

Hello Jefrsmith
I also think a move is a wise decision. From what I have observed from the culture here is that if he feels he has lost face, then there will be no end to retaliation and a peace offering without reconciliation will be seen as a power win and only promote similar behavior. Good luck with finding a new residence.
regards  Bruce

GoDees wrote:

Hello Jefrsmith
I also think a move is a wise decision. From what I have observed from the culture here is that if he feels he has lost face, then there will be no end to retaliation and a peace offering without reconciliation will be seen as a power win and only promote similar behavior. Good luck with finding a new residence.
regards  Bruce

Thanks GoDees. This has become serious now, and I think only a move will end it.